Rib Eye Jack's Ale House, Part Duh...

Burlington's Rib Eye Jack's Ale House has become my
new Cheers - a place where everybody knows my beers.
What? You thought I was gonna say "name"? Uhhh, no,
can't do that since I'm in the Witness Relocation Program

When last we talked, (well, I wrote, you read, which is good because literacy is important - it's just a damn shame this blog does nothing to promote literacy and that you may, in fact, lose a few IQ points reading this thing), we had stopped in Rib Eye Jack's Ale House to celebrate my buddy Ernie's birthday. That was two Thursday ago. I have been back twice since - last Thursday and again on Saturday.

Now the news that I found a bar to which I'll happily return is as about as surprising as your local newscaster coming on and seriously intoning, "This just in! Humans continue to need oxygen to survive! We'll follow that up with a special Eye-Witness News Action Report that water also remains wet at this point in time and still flows downhill with remarkable, almost liquid-like ease."

Have to take a whiz but the hockey game's gone into
overtime?? Not an issue. You can keep watching in the
Men's Washroom. Ladies, sorry, you're out of luck...

So when I popped in on the Thursday, I was on my way home from work because the bar is literally on the back-road route I take during rush hour to avoid the highway. The fact that every Thursday is Tap The Keg Thursday wasn't too much of a factor. (And in continuing news, fire can be warm to the touch.) The first Thursday I went, after we extensively talked craft beers, uber-knowledgeable Beer Technician To The Stars Kylie (the 'beer technician' part is her actual title and man, has she earned it) made sure I sampled the Flying Monkeys Netherworld Cascadian Dark Ale from the mini-keg on its side at the bar. "I think they hopped it up a little more," she smiled, knowing my fondness for all things hoppy. I reviewed it before so I won't repeat myself but yes, still a great dark ale! On the second Thursday, while I happily quaffed a Great Lakes Brewery Lake Effects IPA, it was a different brew in the keg (as it is every week). After noting that Lake Effects IPA now comes in a 473-ml (16 ounce) can whereas last year it was only available in a 650-ml (22 ounce) bottle with a really cool painted label that Kylie and I both preferred, it was time to try a sample from the new keg - the Niagara Teaching College's Tracie Does Portland IPA, a 6.9% offering. It was nicely fruity on the nose but to me, a bit too sweet on my tongue for an IPA. I want bitter and tangy, not sweet. Not bad but well, not great.

Apparently, you have to be famous like
Frank or Marilyn or Dino or Angelina to
end up on the walls at Rib Eye Jack's...
So no pictures of me. Until I put one up!

But it was the food that Marie and Ernie raved about after his birthday. Marie had their Kentucky Bastard Rib-Eye Steak (made with basting sauce using Nickel Brook Brewing's Old Kentucky Bastard Imperial Stout) while Ernie had the Tennessee Chicken basted in Wild Turkey Bourbon. They both raved and remember, Ernie and Marie are the ultimate foodies. When they enjoy a restaurant's food as much as their own, well, someone's doing something very, very right. But with Marie's young son, Marc, in tow, it was time to go decadent for dessert with something called Death By Chocolate. (Marc recently informed me very solemnly that there was a serious Lego shortage this Christmas so, uhhh, if you need more Legos, you should buy now, I guess. All I know about Legos is they hurt like shit if you step on one.) Okay, the ingredients in this dessert are the following: chocolate ice cream, chocolate brownie, chocolate fudge, peanut caramel chocolate bar pieces, chocolate chips topped with chocolate sauce and whipped cream. What can I say? Thank god, they added whipped cream to make this a much more balanced, healthy, nutritious dessert. Let's assume they called it Death By Chocolate because Big-Ass Bowl of Diabetes was taken.

But you know, despite not being much of a foodie, I had to try to try their food myself if I wanted to talk about it. So it was time on Saturday for a proper dinner date with the beautiful Lee. (She really enjoyed Flying Monkeys' Smashbomb Atomic IPA when she first tried it with me so that's pretty much all the qualifications she needs for a dinner date with me... The staggeringly beautiful thing, well, that also helps. Not gonna lie)

When Rib Eye Jack's held their Beer Fest
on October 17, the gang at Barrie's Flying
Monkeys Brewery were in the hizzouse!!!

I remembered Marie raving about Turtle Island Brewing's Smashed Cherry Ale and Lee did leave her beer choices in my hands, so that was first up. Now I first met Trish Watson, the Ottawa brewery's co-founder and "Beer Goddess" at the Burlington Beer Festival last summer. At that time, Beer Musketeer Cat also had their Smashed Cherry (I went for the Maple Porter) and also raved. But it was their 6.5% Ixcacao Triple Chocolate Stout that slayed us both. Anyways, back to Smashed Cherry... this beer is cherry (but medicinal, like Hall's Lozenge cherry) and malt on the nose with some tart bitterness on the tongue. A pretty solid Summer beer and three-for-three with the ladies who run in my circle.

Next up, she had to try the Nickel Brook Naughty Neighbour American Pale Ale, a bar favourite. When I was there on Thursday, you could upgrade your 20 ounce pint of Naughty Neighbour to a 32 ounce stein for $1 more (yup, one buck) and the spigot, directly in front of me, was doing huge business in the stein sector. Kylie confessed when Nickel Brook Brewmaster Ryan was in the house, that was his preference, despite the countless cool Imperial IPAs on hand. Well, with Lee, Naughty Neighbour earned its 93 points on RateBeer as she called citrus and fruit on the nose, grapefruit on the tongue. (There's also some pine on the tongue, as well.) When she decided to go for a dirty martini as her third choice, I decided to get a beer for myself that she would really enjoy.

Trish Watson, co-founder of much-loved Turtle Island
Brewing in Ottawa, makes one helluva great cherry ale

Yes, it's past Summer so wheat and saison season is well gone but I thought a Mcauslan Apricot Wheat might be in order for my date. *Ding, ding, ding* We had a winner. Although far too sweet for me, she loved it. Actually, she went nuts for it. I dunno but to me, it's pretty cool when a confirmed wine drinker actually says, "I had no idea there were so many different tastes with beers. These are all delicious!" People, we may just have a craft beer convert.

On my end, I had pints of Mill Street Cobblestone Stout and Muskoka Mad Tom IPA (both of which have been given huge thumbs up in this space) but let's talk food. Lee, like Ernie, had the Tennessee Chicken while I opted for the Grilled Rainbow Trout. Okay, here's where we got to share. Hers came with garlic mashed potatoes while mine came with vegetable quinoa (no idea - like soft rice). I ate her potatoes, she ate my quinoa - it worked out well. Never had a food that started with a 'Q' before and well, Saturday, I wasn't about to start.

Anyone looking for a good Christmas present
for me, well, this would work well. Just sayin'...

The food was delicious but I have to give total props to our waitress, Tiffany. She was entertaining. She was engaging. She totally complimented me with a "holy crap, job well done, dude" for the Lovely Lee when my date left briefly for the lady's room. She was just plain a lot of fun and added a ton of happy chatter and friendship to our night. Between Tiffany's sparkle and Kylie's beer knowledge, well, there is just no downside to this Disneyland of Beers in Burlington. There will be many more beer reports from this locale. I'm sure they'll get quite sick of seeing my face but that's the beauty of being me. I don't care. But I'm sure if I actually had feelings, they'd be hurt. I guess.

Okay, some questions from Beer Musketeer Glenn get answered! First up, when I had the Mid-Autumn Night's Decadent Dangerous Craft Beer Festival at Donny's Bar and Grill, Glenn arrived hours before everyone else. He grabbed the 2011 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition off my coffee table for the patio but later asked, "Is there any actual sports in this?" I had no idea so I did my due diligence afterwards. No, there is not. Also, who cares?

Okay, Glenn Question #2: Does Guinness brew anything but Guinness? Again, a legitimate question - and I knew they made a Black Lager but beyond that, I had no idea.

Well, yeah, but seriously, isn't that a year-round sentiment?

Turns out Guinness makes dozens of beers, most of which I've never heard of.  And so, Donny's Beer Bucket List grows exponentially!

And finally a Glenn Vs Skype Question Moment... brought to you by my little October Beer Fest. Glenn, feeling pretty wobbly, is on Skype with Stevil St Evil in New Zealand and it went like this:
Glenn: Who's that in the bottom right corner?
Stevil: That's you.
Glenn: No, it's not!
Stevil: Yes, it is.
Glenn: *puts on his glasses* Hey, you're right! That's me! I'm better looking than I thought.
Stevil: No, you're not.
So back in a few day with more beer and much more fun. But for now, guys and dolls, that's it, that's all and I am outta here!!!! Until next time I remain...