Flying Monkeys phases out bottles

While the sun was literally setting on this bucolic scene of
a couple of Flying Monkeys' Smashbomb Atomic IPAs on
Donny's Party Patio Porch this past Summer, it was also
figuratively setting on the use of glass six-packs by the
brewery itself. Suddenly, they just stopped appearing.

When I started this little horse-and-pony show back in June 2013, times were different. For starters, it was June 2013. It's not anymore. Science, what can I say?

But all the craft beers I loved came in six-pack bottles of the 355-ml (12 ounce) size. Nickel Brook's Headstock IPA and Naughty Neighbour APA - six pack bottles. Within a year or so - Collective Arts Rhyme & Reason Extra Pale Ale and Ransack the Universe IPA - six pack bottles. Muskoka Mad Tom IPA and Twice As Mad Imperial IPA - six pack bottles. Amsterdam Boneshaker IPA - six pack bottles. And finally, my first IPA love (and you never forget your first love) Flying Monkeys Smashbomb Atomic IPA, as well as their Hoptical Illusion Almost Pale Ale - six pack bottles. Cameron's - my hometown homeys - not only used bottles for their tasty-ass Rye Pale Ale, they used industry standard bottles, the same bottles drinkers get their Bud and Canadian in.

While we were all donning jerseys or putting hockey sticks outside our
front doors to show support for the Humboldt Broncos, this Twitter
picture shows the gang at Flying Monkeys going the extra step. On April
12, the brewery donated $1 from every 16 ounce pint sold that day to the
Humboldt Broncos and its community in Saskatchewan. That's Andrea
up front in the Michigan jersey while co-owner hubby Peter is back left.

Now Nickel Brook, Cameron's and Collective Arts have long since phased out their bottles, opting instead to package those beers in 473-ml (16 ounce) single cans.

But Flying Monkeys, Amsterdam and Muskoka have still maintained the six-pack bottle format, though all of their offerings are also in the 473-ml cans, as well. Until recently, at least.

You see, the Beer Store I was working at that time was one of those Ice Cold Express stores, where there's rollers of beer, mostly macro, up front and accessible to the public while the remainder of the beer was in the back. (As employees, we all prefer the self-serve model although in all honesty, it can be a bitch to keep fully-stocked.) One of the sets of rollers (out of three) was the craft roller and among the selections on that roller, Smashbomb Atomic IPA was a slotted resident for as long as I can remember.

The way it was on the left. The way it is on the right. Even after
Flying Monkeys phased out their bottles, we maintained their
place on the shelf as breweries buy their spots in the Beer Store.

However, once I shifted to a self-serve store, Smashbomb Atomic had a space on a proper shelf. Until, one day, I noticed we hadn't had any in stock for quite some time. More than a month, at least. And I got curious as I wasn't seeing it in nearby LCBOs, either.

Suspecting the brewery was phasing out the bottles, I presented my theory to co-workers who quickly addressed my concerns with a question of their own. "Are you planning on doing ANY work today?" Not satisfied with their answers (because, no, of course, I wasn't), I turned to customers to express my concerns. Their answers were equally unhelpful as to this mystery. "I don't know who the hell you are or why you're asking me some sort of weird Wizard of Oz question but I'm here for 24 Bud and you are in my goddamn way, asshole!"

Before long, Flying Monkeys Juicy Ass IPA landed in the store, I began to wonder if Smashbomb Atomic was being phased out all together?? I hadn't seen it anywhere. Not in Beer Stores!! Not in LCBOs!! The only thing I could do, I figured, would be to drive to Barrie, barge through the front door of the brewery and demand to know what happened to Smashbomb Atomic IPA!!!

Then I remember that Andrea Chiodo, the co-owner of the brewery with hubby Peter, was a friend and I could simply message her and ask. So now I had TWO good options.

As you can see, both Juicy Ass IPA and Smashbomb Atomic IPA do, in
fact, co-exist in harmony. Also, I will open both and then proceed to
further drink both. Why? Because I'm a goddamn trooper, that's why!!

Drive to Barrie, demanding answers!!! Or message Andrea. That was a tough decision to make but eventually, I opted for the latter as it was the more environmentally-friendly option (less fossil fuel involved) of the pair but that does not at all speak to my general laziness. (It so does.)

And as she always has, Andrea, my favourite ex-pat American, (well, I always really dug Obama so call it a draw) was quick to reply. Yes, she assured me, Smashbomb Atomic was still out there. It wasn't the beer being phased out. Simply the bottles.

"Smashbomb will be available in cans but we will no longer have 355-ml bottles. (Also), yes, Juicy Ass is our IPA du jour."

Back when Flying Monkeys decided to package Juicy Ass IPA, all of us
on Twitter were saying, "Use a donkey! Use a donkey!" In the end, they
opted for one of their funky psychedelic designs but Hamilton artist and
cartoonist David Buist jumped in to incorporate both looks into a label.

"However, we will never stop producing Smashbomb. We still love it! The bottles were not doing well. And the TBS (The Beer Store) seems to be the only channel we still had them in."

Of course, like every brewery, they will still have specialty single bottles, like, for instance, their awesome cocoa-bomb The Chocolate Manifesto Triple Chocolate Milk Stout at Christmas time.

"We will still do specialty beers in a bottle. However, the Krones labeller and the 12-bottle filler have been moved out."

Hmmmm, does that mean those Ice Cold Express Beer Stores with the wonky rollers would no longer have Flying Monkeys on the dedicated craft section. Because I mean, cans... they do not roll so well. Well, sonuvagun, the brewery thought of that, too.

This cardboard six-pack was Flying Monkeys' solution to maintaining a
up-front, in the lobby presence at Ice Cold Express Beer Stores. In the
end, they replaced the six-pack bottles of Smashbomb Atomic. Clever!

"You may notice six-packs of Juicy Ass (out there in Beer Stores)," she said. (I hadn't. My store was getting 24-pack trays of singles.) "It was something we thought we'd try for kicks."

But I guess someone at the brewery planted a little bug in the ear of Flying Monkey sales rep, Eric Uhlemann, as he tracked me down this week - even though I had moved to another Oakville store on Monday. Holding up two single cans of my beloved Smashbomb Atomic IPA, he smiled and said, "I hear you've been missing this." Thank you, Andrea, I heart you guys!

Well, Scooby Doo Gang, that's it, that all and I am outta here. Back soon with more because... just because.