Well, no, much more happened than that. I just got stuck, playing repeat on an excellent day that took three columns to explain. But I mean, let's face it. I once started one of these with a laundromat review. This is how I continually exceed expectations. By setting them so low, there is only one direction to go. Ask any of my past employers. They will verify my strategy.
But many other cool things, both beer-related and otherwise, happened in April and now it's time to look at those. First, I noticed something at the Beer Store that I've never seen prior to this. You see, fans of the Toronto Maple Leafs are a long-suffering group of people. Haven't won a Stanley Cup in 50 years. Brief glimpses of promise during those five decades but nothing ever concrete.
For so many Leafs fans, this was the feeling around our team for, well, decades. These days, there is a true sense of optimism as we look to the future. Finally, our beloved team is for real! |
But a few years ago, the Leafs grabbed tough-nosed Brendan Shanahan, making him team president and in the greatest case of larceny ever, then swiped Canadian Men's Hockey gold-winning coach Mike Babcock away from Detroit. Neither of these guys screws around. Ever. If the Leafs won a game 10-0, Babcock would still scowl, "Sloppy in the neutral zone." Both guys are notorious ball-busters who don't cater to the whims of rich athletes. They instantly unloaded a crap-ton of floating, lazy veterans and began to build the team from the bottom up, eyeing the prime rookies and loose scraps from other teams that filled their requirements. The grand rebuild - or the Shanaplan, as it became known - would take four to five years before the team was a true contender, they told us.
It took far less. After finishing in last place (30th overall) in the 2015-16 season, the Leafs went from there to making the playoffs this year, jumping up to 16th place. And in Round One, they faced the toughest team in the entire league - the Washington Capitals who finished first over-all with 118 points.
And that's when things got a little crazy. Rather than fold like a cheap card table, our collection of kids (14 of our players were born in the 1990s, well more than half the roster and some in the late-90s!) not only held their own but pushed the Caps to six games before bowing out. Five of those six games were overtime. Every game was only won by just one goal. We were completely on even footing with the regular season's top team. Our kids didn't seem to notice or care if they were suddenly down by two goals. They just kept tirelessly shooting the puck until it was tied. These youngsters are a certified hockey explosion whose long-running fuse has just been lit.
And here's where the Beer Store comes in. Probably 95% of our clientele are male. Apparently, many are Leaf fans. How do I know? Because even after our playoff ouster, our customers are still wearing their Leaf gear!! During the series against the Caps, American writers and commentators were tripping over themselves to say, "Holy crap, the Maple Leafs are the real deal this time!!!" And Leaf fans are sensing and truly believing the same thing. This has only just begun. Hell, their future is so bright that even Captain America has to wear shades! Glory days are finally looming for Leaf Nation.
And while the Leafs haven't won anything big just yet (but will sooner than we thought), there were many winners at the recent Ontario Brewing Awards on April 27th that number among my favourites.
I will look at their awards scattered throughout upcoming columns because frankly, they're too numerous to mention here. Hell, Cameron's alone won eight! But their new collaborative West Coast IPA with Redline Brewhouse, Going Going Back Back To Cali Cali, was available on May 4th, Star Wars Day, in Barrie at Redline to my Beer Buddies Hago and Shawn. Yet mine won't be available in their Oakville brewery retail (literally down the hill from my Beer Store) until some time in the next two weeks!
So I'm holding their big award news hostage. Yup, Cameron's, when I get my Going Going Back Back To Cali Cali, you get your Award Award Update Update. I ain't playin', homeys. My beer bros are up there in Barrie, posting all over Twitter, jizzing themselves over how awesome this beer is and I'm sitting down here, sadly looking at pictures of this beer when I should be drinking it. That should be incentive enough, I would think. (Commanding Voice of Picard:) Make it so!
However, there is one award-winning brewery I will single out this time and that's my boys at Longslice Brewing in Toronto. I first met brothers Jimmy and John Peat, as well as partner Sebastian Lesch at the 2015 Burlington Summer Beer Festival down at Spencer Smith Park. I fell in love instantly with their Hopsta La Vista IPA, which had collected the gold at the 2014 Ontario Brewing Awards for best British Style IPA. Except for a "British" style, trust me, this beer is jacked up the wazoo with UK Admiral, Comet, Cascade and Galena hops. Sturdy malt backbone (not gonna list those - no one except brewers care) in that British stiff upper lip way, yes, but man, it's one tasty-ass, hoppy beer. Contract-brewed at Etobicoke's Cool Brewing, Hopsta was Jimmy's creation. But John chipped in his own recipe for Vienna-style Loose Lips Lager last year and it landed in the LCBOs through the GTA (Greater Toronto Area). And my, my, my, that was a tasty little deep-hued lager.
So what happens at the OBAs? Loose Lips wins silver in the Oktoberfest/Marzen category while Hopsta wins gold again! Now that these brothers are winning awards hand-over-fist, it's time to tell a little story about Longslice. And that's how they won the Best of Festival for Hopsta La Vista at that 2015 Burlington Beer Summer Fest.
Now, let me start this story by acknowledging the Longslice boys did absolutely nothing untoward. No, they happily manned their tent and as newbies to the Craft Beer Festival circuit, they just had a blast. It might have been me. I struck up an early friendship with the guys on the Friday night and then campaigned steadily on their behalf for the remaining two days of the festival because I liked them and the beer that much. Now when I say "campaign," let's be clear. I mean, I stuffed the shit out of the ballot box. When friends arrived, I took their ballots and wrote in Longslice. Random ballots on the ground? Longslice. Telling other brewers how much I enjoyed their beer and could I have a ballot to vote on their behalf? Longslice. Politics can be a sleazy game.
It got to the point where I was such a frequent visitor that the nice lady at the booth with the ballot box was giving me the hairy eyeball and I had to start making excuses. I suspect my best was (keeping in mind I was well above the legal blood-alcohol limit), "My Mom is too shy to vote for a beer so this is her's." Granted, she wasn't there but she would be too shy. I know her pretty good.
Okay, in other April news, my Beer Writing Videographer Buddy Drunk Polkaroo finally landed the craft beer whale that has eluded him all this time! That would be Russian River Brewing's (Santa Rosa, California) Pliny The Elder Imperial IPA.
A couple of Anderson Valley Brewing treats from my favourite beer technician, the incomparable Kylie at Rib Eye Jack's Ale House in Burlington. |
Well, the word on the street is "the heat is on!" Wait, that's a song. The other word on the street is that this is a beer blog. So perhaps I should write about beer. It's either that or *looks around Donny's Bar and Grill* clean this place. I know, good one, right? The life of a care-free bachelor is far more filled with dust bunnies than Playboy bunnies, that much is certain. And with that, let's look at a couple of recent donations from my favourite beer technician Kylie, she of Rib Eye Jack's Ale House fame.
Now a little while back, Kylie returned from a trip to Arizona where she has family. And when she returns, she always brings a healthy handful of beer treats for the regulars. Well, the ravenous horde of regulars got to her beers before I arrived so she plunked two Anderson Valley Brewing (Boonville, California) brews in front of me. With an apology, if you can believe it. "I'm sorry," she said in all sincerity, "but I had to give you two beers from the same brewery." So if I have this straight, she's apologizing for bringing me two beers from a brewery 2,674 miles (4,303 kilometres) away, a brewery I'll never see? Oh my gawd, lock her up and throw away the key! How does she sleep at night? Meanwhile, I'm just thinking, "Sweet! Free beer!"
Now as it turns out, both offerings were sours (Kylie is a huge fan of the style), their GT Gose and their Blood Orange Gose. Now both beers are wheat ales that are kettle-soured with lactobacillus and prominently feature sea salt and coriander. Yes, Goses are the only beer style that can actually make you thirstier as you drink them. And to my thinking, they're certainly a milder sour style, much like a Berliner Weisse. The GT and Blood Orange were both 4.2% and remarkably similar as I drank them one after the other. I would give a slight edge to the Blood Orange for that touch of the same on the nose (though virtually identical in colour to the GT) though it went lemon-lime on the tongue very quickly, much like the GT. I enjoyed both (thank you, Kylie, you're a #beerangel) and the boys in the Funk Lab at Nickel Brook make a great one called Duplicitous that I'll look at next time.
Okay, all the way from across the ocean in Edinburgh, Scotland comes Innis & Gunn's first attempt at a North American west-coast style IPA, called simply IPA. Now, as everyone knows, Innis & Gunn lean heavily on cask brewing, meaning simply that wooden barrels play a huge role in their beer-making process.
Okay, their IPA, let's go there. At 5.6% and I'm thinking about 50-55 IBUs (international bitterness units), this will not take the top of your head off with hop punch. But while mild, it is extremely flavourful. They dropped Cascade, Centennial and Mardarina hops into the process to give it that west coast appeal. Nothing but citrus (and lots of it) on the nose, this is a pretty easy-drinking (as Polk would say, crushable) IPA. This finishes with resin, citrus and a light floral taste on the tongue. If any barrel was involved here, I'll be damned if I can taste it. Looks like they finally bought a stainless steel vat or two in Edinburgh. Welcome to the 1980s' craft brewing process, Innis & Gunn. Our phones are computers now. But this was a damn good beer that I'll call a solid session brew that I will have again. Nice job. Go rejoice in kilts and eat some haggis for this one.
Am I full yet? Excuse me but does my T-Shirt look like I'm full yet? We're not up to the shoulders so I say keep pouring. The T-Shirt never lies. More! |
Okay, let's finish this one with a big one, the Elora Brewing's Elora Borealis Citra Pale Ale. Okay, before we start, ten points to Gryffindor for the clever name, a play on the Aurora Borealis, also known as the Northern Lights. That's the colourful and bizarre lighting across the Canadian northern skies late at night that 99.9% of us Canucks have never seen because we don't live even remotely close to the phenomena. But we own that shit anyway because dammit, it's a Canadian thing. And from the pictures, it looks pretty cool.
But back to the beer. I have enjoyed, immensely in both cases, Elora Brewing's Lady Friend IPA and their Three Fields Unfiltered Triple Grain Lager. This was one of those rare cases where a brewery's lager was far hazier than its IPA. Well, throw the Elora Borealis into the mix, too, because this was damn good. Single-hopped, of course, this 5.1%, 30 IBU brew was all citrus on the nose with much more citrus and a touch of grapefruit on the tongue. This is a leading contender for the Single Hopped Ale category that I just invented for my year-end awards, specifically because of this beer. Delicious!
Okay, gang at Cheers, that's it for this go-around but I will be back very soon with the buy-out shenanigans at both Lagunitas Brewing and Wicked Weed Brewing in my next outing a couple of days from now, entitled "Selling Out or Selling Up?" (The jury is still out.) But guys and dolls, that's it, that's all and I am outta here! Until next time, I remain...
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