Burlington Beer Fest, Part 3

The Flying Monkeys' booth had just the right
stuff for a young lady who wanted "something
sweet" - their Chocolate Manifesto Milk Stout!

Now let's see - where was I? Ah, yes, at the Burlington Beer Festival, held July 17-19 at the lush, green and on this weekend, very muddy Spencer Smith Park.

So let's go back to the Saturday where I was wandering the ground, trying new beers and old favourites while waiting for my Beer Store buddies, Jay and Gordo, and friend Steve to show up. (They had all worked day shifts - I had the day off.) As I wandered, I overheard a young couple (maybe 22 or so) with the lady saying to her fellow, "I want something sweet! Find me something sweet!" Sensing the lad might have been in over his head, I stepped in and offered up a suggestion. "Hey guys, two booths over is Flying Monkeys. Follow me. I think there's one you'll really like."

Despite the fact I was a complete stranger, they did exactly that (I must have used my "Dad Tone" without realizing it) and I plunked a token down on the counter and said to the server, "She'll have a Manifesto." I was careful not to say the beer's full name, which is The Chocolate Manifesto, a 10% triple milk chocolate stout. She eyed it warily - I presume it was a lot darker than she expected - so I said, "Just smell it. I won't poison you." She did and her eyes lit up. She dove right in. "Oh my gawd, this is so good!!!" (It's practically a chocolate cake in a glass.)

The lead singer for In My Coma belts out a tune on the
Friday night. As you can see, my favourite brewery
had a pretty big banner across the front of the stage...

What the young fellow didn't know was that I basically handed him a lesson he can use for the rest of his life. If your lady is feeling, well, a little irritable, give her chocolate as quickly as possible. It increases the rate that tryptophan enters the brain, which, in turn, increases the level of serotonin that near-instantly creates a warm, fuzzy feeling, especially in women. And at 10%, I bet she was even warmer and fuzzier after that, especially if she had a couple more. There you go - don't say I never taught you anything. "You two have a great time," I smiled before wandering off. "Thank you!" she yelled as I got further away, "I love you!" Thank you, honey, but that's the serotonin talkin' - you love chocolate, not me. Appreciate the sentiment nonetheless, though.

Finally Jay and Steve showed up. Now Jay's actual name is Jason Lee, just like the "My Name Is Earl" actor. So we just call him Jay... unless I feel like that's too long. Then I just call him J. And Jay's friend Steve, well, he was our host for the big Mayweather vs Pacquiao fight out of the MGM Grand in Las Vegas at the beginning of May. We watched that cuddle-fest on the largest HD screen I have ever seen in my life. Honestly, I felt like I had a better view of that fight than the referee.

The Sawdust City Brewing booth was a must-stop
for my buddy Jay as I knew he would love their
Golden Beach Pale Wheat and he certainly did!

"Where's Gordo?" I asked. "Well, he picked us up on his way home from work, we had a beer at his place (an apartment directly across the street from the park) and he's just cleaning up before he comes over," Jay said. I instantly panicked. "Text him now and tell him not to wear capri pants!" One time, a bunch of Beer Store employees got together at Joe Dogs, a bar near Gord's and when he showed up, he was wearing capri pants, I kid you not. "What the actual eff, dude?" I barked. "Who are you? Mary Tyler Moore on The Dick Van Dyke Show??" (For the record, she wore it better than Gordo.) "What?" he said. "Guys wear these now!" "Where?" I retorted, "In prison?" So Jay texted him and Gordo showed up not in capri pants, which I actually suspect he threw out after all the razzing.

"Okay, Donny, where are we starting?" Jay asked. Well, there were two I had in mind for the boys instantly. First up, the Longslice Brewing's Hopsta La Vista IPA. Mindful of the fact that the guys don't like more than one of anything too hoppy (I'm the polar opposite - all hops, all day, bring it), I suspected the strong malt backbone of the Hopsta La Vista would be enough to counter the hoppiness of the 6.5%, 69 IBU (international bitterness units) bomb-blast of a beer. And it was. "This is great! It's hoppy and malty all at the same time!" Jay enthused. Steve loved it too but it was a bit much for Gordo, our resident Coors Light/Molson Canadian drinker. (That's fine - to each their own, right?)

That's right - we certainly do! That's two
straight years of an excellent Beer Festival!

So next up was something a little milder for Gordo - the Sawdust City Golden Beach Pale Wheat (although, to be honest, I still didn't know it was a wheat at this point.) With its light citrus on the nose and smooth grapefruit and pine on the tongue, I knew this 5% beer would a better fit for Gordo. And it was. He and Steve both really enjoyed it. Jay's reaction was a little different, a touch more emphatic. "Donny, I want to drive to Gravenhurst right now, buy a case of this beer and sit on a patio all day drinking it!! And then have three more cases in reserve!!" He still talks about that road trip now so let's assume he was serious. So buckle up, Sawdust City, the Jay And Donny Show is coming your way soon because if he's going, I'm going! Someone has to chaperone... me.

All four of us really enjoyed their Gateway Kolsch lagered-ale, as well. As a lager drinker, it was perfect for Gordo, Steve called it "refreshing" while Jay simply declared, "Do these guys even make a bad beer?" (No, they do not.) Slightly grainy on the nose, smooth pilsnery finish on the tongue - a really great summer beer and one that crossed paths for four very different beer drinkers.  Feeling empowered by his success thus far at the Sawdust City booth, Jay gamely tried their Lone Pine IPA and still came away happy. "It's got some nice fruitiness to it," he noted. "As long as I had some Golden Beach to go with it, I'd be great!"

My main man, Brian Will, the territory
manager for all those tasty Double Trouble
Brewing beers that are in my Beer Store

Just a quick sidenote before we get to our next booth: my old high school buddy, Dennis, has a cottage in Gravenhurst and when he was up there a couple of weeks back, he asked on my Facebook wall, "There's a brewery up here called Sawdust City. To quote The Clash, should I stay or should I go?" My response was something to the effect of "Go! Go now! Go quickly! Why are you still sitting there, reading this?" Well, Dennis went and is still enjoying their beers at his Burlington home, as we speak. Sounds like after sampling them, Dennis stocked up hard. Good on ya, mate!

Okay, the next booth may as well have been called Beer Store Heaven as we found the Double Trouble Brewing booth, manned by none other than Brian Will, the territory manager for North American Craft, which handles all the brewery's beers for LCBOs and Beer Stores in our area (though I'm not sure how large that area is.) Well, knowing us all, Brian basically declared it the "Beer Store Workers Drink For Free Hour" at his booth, refusing to take our tokens. (Actually, Steve works in Marketing and that's kind of what Brian does so there's a kinship.) Gordo happily piled into their Prison Break Pilsner, a big favourite of his while Jay immediately went for his sweetheart, their tasty Fire in the Rye Ale, a 6.1%, 60 IBU specialty grain beer that uses roasted rye malts for a tangy treat. Honestly, I think Steve was just bouncing from beer to beer, trying them all with a big-ass smile on his face because, well, free beer.

You sexy bastard, do you know how long I've
waited for you? No, I don't mean Double Trouble
co-founder Nathan (although I'm sure he's very
nice.) I mean that Revenge of the Ginger Kickin'
Ginger IPA and I finally had it at the Beer Fest!

Okay, as a Beer Store employee, Double Trouble has done me a huge service by making their Hops and Robbers IPA and here's why. If a mainstream-beer-drinking customer asks me for something with a little more punch (and they always say "hoppy" even if they don't know what that means), I will instantly steer them towards a Hops and Robbers. At 5.7% and only 55 IBUs, it's not gonna blow the top off anyone's head. It's nice, it's sessionable and if it turns out that they can handle that, only then I will steer them into Mad Tom or Smashbomb Atomic territory. But I was thrilled to finally see their Revenge of the Ginger (a nod to co-founder Nathan) Kickin' Ginger IPA in Brian's ice bucket! Billed as a "spice beer", this has a unique style to it. Obviously, ginger (almost ginger ale) on the nose, more ginger, a little spice, a little caramel on the tongue. While at 6.2% and (I'm guessing) 60 IBUs, it's a bit of a stretch calling this an IPA but I wouldn't hesitate in calling this a nicely-spiced pale ale. Regardless, what's in a name? A rose by any other name would... uh, Shakespeare, something, something.
So while Sawdust City was Jay's favourite tent and mine was Longslice Brewing, it's safe to say the Double Trouble booth was definitely the one we had the most fun hanging at. Great job, guys, and welcome back to Burlington any time!

Yes, I recognize that this is the third straight blog that I
have included a picture of Batman at the Burlington
Beer Festival so I will just say it in my calm quiet voice:
WAS BATMAN AT YOUR BEER FEST? WAS HE???

Now since I started about three hours earlier than the boys and as late-comers to the ball, they were drinking at a rapid pace, I soon found myself in that position where I was telling myself, "I'm fine, I'm good, I'm fine. I'm good..." and then suddenly, it's like, "Whoa, did gravity just increase by like 12 times???" So I did what I usually do - just cleared out without a word to anyone. My long-time friends actually have a word for it: phantomed. As in, "Where's Donny?" "Haven't seen him in 25 minutes - guess he phantomed again." The reason I phantom is simply this. If I know it's time to go, I just go because if I tell anyone I'm leaving, there's always those guys who will try to talk you into "just one more." Gordo is the King of Just One More.

Now in truth, I'm not finished with this yet so it looks like there will be a Part 4 to this tomorrow, including the events of Sunday, Muddy Sunday and the Great Coaster War of 2015. So in answer to the question: How much can one man write about a three-day Beer Festival, the answer is apparently "too much." But guys and dolls, that's it, that all and I am outta here! Until tomorrow with the finale, Burlington Beer Festival, Part 4, I remain as always...

Burlington Beer Fest, Part 2

Burlington Chamber of Commerce president
Keith Hoey, left, shares a laugh with John
Romano, owner of Nickel Brook Brewery,
which is in my mind, the BEST business in
that umbrella group. But again, I'm bias...

Now before I begin the Burlington Summer Beer Festival, Part 2 blog, I have to veer off course a little here and talk about the first word in that title, my city of Burlington.

Beer Bro Glenn and I drive down to the Burlington Beer Fest on Sunday and I have, of course, zero intention of bringing my car home. It's dry-docked in downtown Burlington for the night in a municipal parking lot very close to the backdoor of Burlington City Hall, well within walking distance to the Beer Fest. But when we got into the car to go, it was as hot as blazes! Pointless to turn on the air-conditioning as it's less than a 15-minute drive. No way to generate any cold air in that short a run. What do you do? Well, you roll down all the windows and at least get some fresh air circulating for the quick run.

Which is what I did. Found a parking spot and rolled up the windows. Off we went. Except this one thing. While we dutifully rolled up the front windows, I never thought to roll the back windows up because they aren't usually open. So all night in a public parking lot, my back windows were wide-open.

Now normally that's not a biggie (unless it rains) except for this one small thing. I had a brand-new leather Callaway golf bag in my back seat, still in the box. Completely unprotected. Just sitting there.

This guy at the Sierra Nevada Pale Ale booth was not
only fun to talk to, he also had the most awesome ginger
fro ever! It was like one of Ron Weasley's big brothers
served me that beer! Probably the one who lived...

When I got back to the car in the morning and saw the back windows wide open, I thought, "Well, the golf bag's pretty much on Kijiji at this point. Oh well." And when I approached the car and looked in, the golf bag was, of course... still there! How is that even possible? Probably because this is Burlington, Ontario, Canada. I met the Burlington Chamber of Commerce president Keith Hoey on the weekend and I would just say this to him. I have no doubt there are many elements of your job that are quite challenging. But selling this beautiful (and relentlessly honest) city to the world? That's not one of them.

That said, this blog is about beer, not civic pride although this event ties the pair together nicely. Now before I get to Saturday (I, more of less, covered Friday in the previous blog), there was one recommendation from Nickel Brook's Rob on the Friday and it wasn't for his own brewery. As the guy who fills my growlers with Headstock IPA more often than not, he knows I've had everything they had on hand. No,he steered me towards the neighbouring Sawdust City Brewing out of Gravenhurst and their Golden Beach Pale Ale. Man, good call. According to my voice recorder, this was, "Lessee, really nice citrus on the nose and, whoa, really nice citrus, grapefruit and pine on the tongue. Definite winner."

The boys at the Sawdust City Brewing booth. The
one who served me the most was the bandana guy
on the right who I happily just called Biker Bob... 

There's a few of their beers that have pine on the tongue, most notably their outstanding Lone Pine IPA. Now all their servers were great but the best was a grizzled-looking, friendly-as-hell dude I just called Biker Bob. When I was sweltering on the steamy, unbearable heat on Sunday, Biker Bob pointed to some taps across the way and suggested that I not only wet down my hair but also my outback drinking hat. "I did that with my bandana and it really works. Cools you down, like, 10 degrees." As I felt the cool water dripping down my front and back, I can say, yeah, he knows his body temperature stuff. And that Golden Beach Pale, turns out it's a wheat beer. I had no idea until I checked out RateBeer afterwards. Yeah, it was cloudy like all wheats but many beers are. Nearly all of Muskoka Brewing's line is unfiltered, giving them that same cloudiness. But as you'll see, much like Rob did for me, I turned a few of my friends onto the Golden Beach Pale Wheat Ale.

Saturday was a great day. I landed there at about 2 pm, a few hours before my Beer Store cohorts, Jay and Gordo, as well as buddy Steve, were slated to arrive. Event co-organizer Wayne Brown had told me that one of my favourite breweries, Highlander Brewing out of tiny South River, had suffered a mishap during a huge storm in the middle of the night.

The Highlander Brew Co's canopy, shown here on
Friday night, was looking like mangled metal on
Saturday as high winds during an early morning
storm tossed it around like a rag-doll in a hurricane

"I guess the wind during the storm just picked up their front canopy and completely trashed it," Wayne noted. When the brewery returned early Saturday morning, they put out an emergency call and had a new metal canopy frame there within hours, just in time for the noon opening.

So, of course, they deserved some of my business. "Fill this up with your finest Smoked Porter, good sirs," I happily said. (The Highlander Smoked Porter was one of the highlights for Beer Bro Stevil St Evil during his stay here at the beginning of June.) The young fellow at the counter, clearly knowing I was familiar with their products, looked me up and down and said, "No, you look like the kind of discerning beer drinker that would enjoy our Wee Heavy even more" and poured me that, instead. Well, I'm not actually a discerning anything but okay then, Wee Heavy it was. I instantly knew with one quick sniff that I was drinking a Scotch Ale (as it turns out an 8% one), the second one from brewmaster Brian Wilson (yes, that Brian Wilson from The Beach Boys - oh wait, no, hold on - it's a different guy altogether) after their 5% Scottish Ale. They like their beers heavy up north. Well, when I checked RateBeer, it became readily apparent why Young Server wanted me to try this beer. It's brand new. It has only two reviews on RateBeer and I'm one of them. Giving it a 4.5 out of 5, I noted that it was "rich in caramel and Scotch notes on the nose, smooth, thick and tasty on the tongue."

Bayside Brewing Co., out of Erieau, Ontario,
saw some good crowds at the Burlington Beer
Festival on the weekend of July 17-19, held at
the city's often-muddy Spencer Smith Park.

While I was wandering around solo (always dangerous - until my friends show up, at which point, it becomes very dangerous!), I popped into Bayside Brewing booth, a brewery I first met at the Burlington Winter Beer Festival back in January. One of their servers actually recognized me from that and in that happy, friendly "how ya doing, man?" way. Beats the alternative, which is, "Oh crap, you again?" which I've gotten a few times. So I bellied up to the Bayside bar and asked, "What have you got for me that's new?" My phone's voice recorder caught the following exchange with their answers in brackets.

"Sorry, what's it called? (Equinox Wheat.) What's the percentage? (4.5%) Okay, what do we have here? Banana on the nose... *tastes* oh, that's really nice. Really good, refreshing, wheat on the tongue, great summer beer! (*not realizing how sensitive the mic on my phone is* You have to say that into the phone!) What I just said." My phone was also picking up the music from The Dirty Pioneers in the background on a stage maybe a football field-length away so catching what I and the Bayside boys were saying? Not an issue. Great little brewery owned by two couples in Erieau, Ontario, right on the shores of Lake Ontario. The Equinox isn't even on RateBeer (the brewery has to do that) but will be duly praised when it is.

I got a thumbs-up from the singer in The Brett
Kocsis Band during their performance on
Saturday. All the bands, whether they played
originals or cover tunes, were really good.

Before my Beer Store thugs even made the scene, it turned out I had tons of home-boys already there of the non-brewery kind. My old Bloor West Village (Toronto) friend, Craig, was there with his lady and her sister and my Burlington buddy Bill.I.Am (you may remember him from his brief, unlauded stint as the couldn't-sing-or-dance pasty-white dude with The Black Eyed Peas, who was eventually replaced by the blacker, much hipper Will.I.Am) was there with his brother-in-law, Ross, and American pal Tony. Now because they're from two different circles of friends, their placement was perfect. Bill was set up in a tent at the east end of the park while Craig was parking it at a west-end tent. So I wandered back-and-forth to hang with my buddies, wandering through three separate beer alleys between the two. Many valiant beers died a noble death on my sojourns between the two camps because, y'know, walking is thirsty work.

Bill had actually seen the 'Brampton' Batman (complete with sick Batmobile) during his time there earlier. "Did you see that guy?" he asked, knowing my love of all things Dark Knight. No, I had just missed him by a Bat-hair. He was literally pulling out the Batmobile out of the park as I wandered over so I got some great shots of the car... but not him.

Batman sets up shop with the guys from Old Tomorrow
Brewing and their tasty Canadian Pale Ale at the Festival

"That poor bastard," Bill chuckled. "That Batman costume was made from some form of PVC (durable outdoor plastic, used mostly for piping) and it must have been 1,000 degrees for him wearing that. Donner, he was just dripping sweat - like it was pouring down his face - in that costume." Clearly, criminals in Gotham City (or Brampton - same thing) would catch a break on that night while the Dark Knight rehydrated. (Batman: "Robin, I am in desperate need of rehydration! Quickly, get me some Bat Fluids!" Robin: "Uhhh, dude, could you be a bit more specific? This is kinda creepy.") Quick aside on Bill, whose last name is Jackman. He is one of just two non-related friends my son, David, refers to as his uncle. One day, David asked him if he knew Hugh Jackman, the actor famous for portraying Wolverine in the X-Men movie. "Sure," Bill told him. "Hugh is my brother." To this day, David still refers to the actor as Uncle Hugh.

When I caught up with Craig, aka Foggy (because he looks and sounds like the cartoon character Foghorn Leghorn), after some initial chatter, he asked, "So you wanna feel old?" Not particularly, I told him but continue on anyway. "Bianca is getting married next weekend." Holy crap, back in the days that Craig and I hung together, Bianca and David were little more than infants. In shock, I said, "I can't believe you're letting your 12-year-old daughter get married!  That's just sick, man!"

See that petite blonde on the right? She's my buddy
Craig's girlfriend's sister's daughter! You follow all of
that? Doesn't matter. She and her friend were manning
the Beau's All-Natural booth at the Burlington Beer Fest

Well, now, as it turned out, Bianca aged at precisely the same speed as David and she, too, is in her mid-20s. And by gawd, just this past weekend, I saw a Facebook picture of Foggy walking his beautiful daughter down the aisle of what appeared to be a very rustic farm setting.

Now I thought I'd be able to wrap up the Burlington Beer Festival blogs with this one, the second of two. I'm not even close. So Part 3 tomorrow. And while I promised this one last week, I was interrupted by two things. First was a visit from my brother Gary and his girlfriend Phe who traveled across the Atlantic Pond from Valencia, Spain for the visit. Naturally, I put them at work, reviewing beer with me. The second thing is a nasty and ongoing infection, serious enough that I did some time for it at Burlington's Joseph Brant Hospital. I'm trying to think of a discreet way of putting it. Hmmm, okay, in terms of how the fellows at Sawdust City Brewing might put it, guys, let's just say below your belt, you have a branch and two pinecones. One of my pinecones is infected and is, in fact, three times the pinecone it was - feel free to wince. And boys, it hurts way more than dropping a fresh beer (that's nasty physical pain versus emotional pain, not to underscore the dropped beer.)

Any port in a monsoon storm? Looks like it as these two
guys park it under the Goose Island tent during the
heavy but short-lived torrential downpour on Sunday.

So how can I guarantee I'll be back tomorrow? Well, I'm in Sick Bay all week after the doctor insisted I stay home and I'm in no physical shape to clean this place up (which I wouldn't do anyway but now I have an out) so why not knock off a few blogs? I'm taking a steady regiment of anti-inflammatories, antibiotics and some really sweet pain killers. I was hoping to hang onto the pain-killers until I felt better but no, turns out I very much need them. Now of course, the pharmacist was explaining all these meds to me because I've never used any of them. One you have to take on a empty stomach, another on a full stomach only and of course, it was suggested I avoid the beers with the pain-killers. Why is that, I asked, will the alcohol negate the effect of the pain killers? No, she said, "you'll just be groggier." I'm in enforced sick bed at Donny's Bar and Grill - groggy has never been an issue there. Naturally, I just take all three at once on an empty stomach, washing them all down with cranberry juice, which is also good for infections in the branch-and-pinecone Zone. And of course, I had to ask the doctor, "How the hell does a (pinecone) get infected?" Turns out nearly anything in that whole urinary tract area is prone to infection. So we're right back to the Burlington Beer Festival tomorrow to wrap this bad-ass beer fest up and probably a few other things, answering questions to such deep thoughts as why does your smoke detector warn you that its battery is dangerously low by beeping 4,000 times? Why doesn't it just save some of that juice for fire detecting? But guys and dolls, that's it, that's all and I am outta here!!! Until tomorrow, I remain...

Burlington Beer Fest, Part 1

 Burlington Ward 2 Councillor Marianne Meed Ward, left, and Nickel
Brook Brewery owner John Romano, right, watch on as Burlington
Chamber of Commerce prez Keith Hoey taps the first keg to open the
Second Annual Summer Burlington Beer Festival on July 17. The
event drew literally hundreds of craft beer lovers to Spencer Smith
Park with dozens of brews available to handle the thirst from the heat

Wasn't that a party? When the Second Annual Summer Burlington Beer Festival was held at the city's beautiful Spencer Smith Park from July 17 to 19, it did have some of the exact same elements of their inaugural run last year.

Well, when I say elements, I mean actual elements. As in rain. However, this year, we got off a lot easier. Whereas last summer, it rained through the entire Saturday - the cash cow day for brewers at any Beer Fest - this year, we got this crazy monsoon-level rain burst for about 30 minutes on Sunday.

Oh, it didn't stop any of us... well, for more than a half hour, anyway. Actually, come to think of it, it didn't stop me at all. Seeking shelter in one of the tents at the park's west end, I waited it out for maybe 10 minutes before finally saying, "Oh screw the rain" and walking through the torrential downpour across to the Cameron's Brewing tent 30 feet in front of me and filling up on their delicious award-winning White Oat Savant Brown Ale.

Hey, I'm sure Beer Festival was fun, too, but hey, did
YOURS get a special visit from the Dark Knight
himself? Yeah, didn't think so.  Batman did find a
moment to stop fighting crime to hang around with
the servers at Barrie's Flying Monkeys Craft Brewery

My rationale (and I use that word loosely since it actually contains the word rational and that is not my forte) behind braving the storm? Well, my glass was empty, the cloud-burst was a welcome relief from the heat and 30 feet in front of me was Cameron's brown ale that won bronze at the US Open Beer Championships earlier in the month. Given all these critical factors, should Mother Nature play any role in my decision-making process? I say no. Beer beats water - even water pouring from the heavens.

But I'll deal with Sunday, Muddy Sunday in tomorrow's blog as once again, I find myself beginning at the end. I was there all three days so let's start at the beginning, shall we?

Friday was actually the nicest day in one regard. Because it was mostly a night-time run (4 to 11 pm), the weather was much more bearable. Saturday and Sunday brought the heat big-time. Even with the breeze off Lake Ontario, it was like Africa-hot down at the park. That said, any Canadian who complains about the heat should get a 10-minute and game misconduct penalty, given what we will be facing in a short few months.

But I was barely there when I crossed paths with Festival co-organizer Wayne Brown.

Hands up if your Beer Festival got a visit from the Bat-Mobile. Quick
show of hands. Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? Anyone? Harmless taunting
aside, isn't this the sickest ride ever?? It made a Saturday appearance.
Can you make out the licence plate? DRKNIGHT - how sweet is that?

Now Wayne and his co-organizer Scott Robinson, not to mention countless helpers and volunteers, have been busting their humps to pull this together, ever since their hugely-successful Winter Beer Festival. And their indefatigable efforts paid off HUGE! Countless meetings, months of planning and promotion (throughout Burlington and beyond), long hours-no showers and well, more blood, sweat and tears than we have seen since the actual band Blood, Sweat and Tears ruled the charts in the 1970s.

That said, the always-genial Wayne went out of his way to introduce me to some of the city's chief big-wigs throughout the event. Among them were:

And speaking of Dynamic Duos, how about Wayne Brown and
Scott Robinson who once again pulled off the greatest Summer
Beer Festival in all of Southern Ontario? Okay, so I'm bias...

Burlington Chamber of Commerce president Keith Hoey, perhaps the only Burlington booster more vocal than Wayne, Ward 2 Councillor Marianne Meed Ward, who I remember well as a religion columnist for the Toronto Sun quite some time ago, Burlington MP Mike Wallace, who I inadvertently referred to as my MPP, accidentally demoting him from federal playing field to the provincial turf (I actually covered Mike as a municipal reporter and remember well when he made the jump to Ottawa) and many many more VIPs.

And while they were all really great to meet, no one was moreso than Wayne's wife, Christine. I had a chance to chat with her and she enthusiastically told me about a Craft Beer and Food Pairing six-week program coming to Oakville's Liaison College in a few months. Using a master chef, who I also met (with his bushy beard, he bore a strong resemblance to many of the craft brewers on hand), the program will pair three different styles of beer with three different types of food. I plan on attending this course because, frankly, every style of beer I've ever enjoyed has been paired with only two food groups - the cheeseburger and pizza.

This lovely young lady at the Samuel Adams
booth holds up my beer of choice from the
Boston brewery, their Rebel IPA. Mmmm...

Perhaps it's time to expand my horizons. Who knows? Some day, some nice lady out there might actually be impressed with my new beer-and-food-pairing knowledge. If not, I'll keep handing her craft beers until I'm at least a little bit handsome. But this new program sounds outstanding and I'll include a link to the college at the end. The program can be easily searched from there. But you had to be there to see Christine's eye light up when she talked about the program. The love of good craft beer runs deep in the Brown family. Just a great lady happily providing what sounds to be a wonderful program.

But every year, I find new discoveries at the Burlington Beer Festival. Last summer, it was Turtle Island Brewing out of Ottawa, helmed by beer goddess Trish Watson and her bomb-blast Ixcacao Triple Chocolate Stout, Maclean's Ales out of tiny Hanover, Ontario and their outstanding Pale Ale (they have an India Pale Ale on the market now that I am searching out) and Side Launch Brewing out of Collingwood with their delicious dunkel Dark Lager.

At the Winter version of the Burlington Beer Festival, it was Bayside Brewing out of blink-and-you'll-miss-it Erieau, Ontario, who nicely surprised me with their smooth Brown Ale. not to mention Trish once again who melded her Ixcacao with melted butter for the ultimate Winter treat.

Sebastian Lesch and John Peat of Toronto's Longslice
Brewing hold up their show-stopping Hopsta La Vista,
which despite an inordinate amount of hops, won the
gold at the 2015 Ontario Brewing Awards for British
IPA. How did they even get it into that category???

Well, I found this year's Newcomer of the Year very quickly on Friday night when I walked up to the Longslice Brewing booth, manned by partners Jimmy and John Peat and Sebastian Lesch. "What do you guys bring?" I asked innnocently. Turns out just one - their Hopsta La Vista IPA. It's their only beer thus far. "What?", I noted in wide-eyed wonderment, "You started your brewery with an IPA? No blonde ale, no brown ale? You jumped into the market armed with an IPA?"

Okay, before I go any further, allow me to explain why this is such a bold and perhaps dangerous move. With their inherent hoppiness, IPAs are a real roll of the dice because not all beer drinkers can handle it. Less than 10% of craft beer drinkers, probably - though count me among that 10%. But with my first sip, I understood their strategy. All hops on the nose, the taste went in a different direction altogether. "Wow," I marvelled, "that has a strong malt backbone to it!!" What the trio has created is the best British-West Coast malt-and-hop hybrid IPA I have ever tasted in my life. A few other breweries have tried - for instance, Junction Craft Brewing's Conductor IPA - but this is the best by far. I mean, these guys killed it, then resurrected it and then destroyed it again, using Thor's hammer! Blew me away! I cannot wait for September when (fingers crossed) this 6.5%, 69 IBU (international bitterness units) bad boy made by these bad boys will be in the LCBO.

Hey, it ain't a Beer Fest unless my home-boys from Nickel
Brook Brewing are there, wowing the thirsty throngs!!

Okay, that's enough for this time around but like I said, I'll be back tomorrow with Round #2 which includes everything else. Which Sawdust City Brewing beer did Rob from Nickel Brook steer me toward? How did that Coaster War between Longslice and Cool Brewery get started? And what are their connection? Who did Rib Eye Jack's Ale House's head honcho Steve and I meet from Whitby's Brock Street Brewing while out having a smoke? Why was "Where's Kylie?" the most asked question of Saturday? What hilarious, foolhardy but ultimately brave act did the server from the Shiny Apple Cider commit during Sunday's monsoon? What happened when we hooked up with my man Brian Will, the territory manager from North American Craft who actually puts all those tasty Double Trouble Brewing beers in my Beer Store? Who was the uber-cool marching bagpipe band who strolled through the grounds on Sunday? What happened with my golf bag? And why am I asking all these teaser questions one day before I write the story? Well, that's simply so I'll remember what to write. Trick of the trade. Oh yeah and Christine's food-and-beer pairing course, here's the link to the college right: HERE! But guys and dolls, until tomorrow, that's it, that's all and I am outta here!!! Until then, I remain, as always...

The Summer of Beer... so far

This was the summer that the baby chipmunk found the
"feeding zone" at Donny's Bar and Grill. Stevil St Evil
kept clicking his tongue in some crazy African dialect
during his stay here, hoping that the little fellow would
find the peanuts. He eventually did. Good work, man.
Also, this is the face I make when I start eating dinner
and then someone else says, "Let's say Grace." D'oh!

This may just be one of the best Summers I've ever had... and according to the calendar, it basically just started. I mean, June 20th is the first day of Summer which means technically I have two more months of it. Or because I live in Canada, 15 more minutes of it...

I have caught up with so many old friends this Summer that it's staggering. And as my high school buddy Lubin likes to hear me say, there are no friends like old friends. Also, his son Victor thinks I'm Batman because one of my first Facebook profile pics was me, wearing a Batman t-shirt. He was just a toddler way back when his father and I first connected on Facebook and he used to say to his Dad with alarming frequency, "Go to Batman's profile!" Victor, please don't tell people that I'm Batman. You put all my loved ones at risk. I mean, the Joker reads this blog, you know. He's just that insane.

I am mentioning Lubin not just because he's a good friend (who I may or may not owe money to - I'm never certain) but also because my Summer started in May when my White Oaks Secondary School class from Oakville first held a Mini-Reunion at the end of the month. I wrote about that reunion in great length in this space and, well, again I may or may not have won a Pulitzer Prize for the piece. Lemme check my trophy case. *Looks at coffee table. Empty beer bottles. No Pulizter* There's always next year.

You see this devastatingly handsome young man
in the Toronto Maple Leafs jersey? This would
be Neil Miller, New Zealand's Beer Writer of
the year and my brother from another mother.
When I sent a Canadian Care Package back to
New Zealand with Stevil St Evil, as well as a
dozen or so Canuck craft beers, I also included
a Matt Sundin jersey and Leafs' coaster because
I didn't want my brother wearing any Montreal
Canadien contraband from the Black Market...

But that reunion was barely over when suddenly Beer Bro and Humber College Journalism School buddy Stevil St Evil was on the doorstep of Donny's Bar and Grill at the beginning of June, complete with hideous Hawaiian shirts (the only kind worth owning) and a bushel-basket full of top-notch New Zealand IPAs. During his two-week stay in Ontario, a solid week was spent here, drinking top-of-the-line Canadian craft beer. Steve left Canada for New Zealand in 2001 because as it turns out, their winters hit a low of, oh, 14C (or 57F to my American readers). I asked him how he was coping without snow. His haunting, sinister laughter still echoes in my ears to this day.

Since we last saw each other a few decades ago, I've been married twice and then divorced twice. He's been married once, then divorced and then lost both his legs just below the knees due to an incredibly-rare genetic infection. (Sorry but I'm still convinced he got off easier than me.) He gets around pretty good on those prosthetic legs though I will admit, they'd be a lot cooler if they were bionic limbs made of titanium that shot lasers and stuff. Dear Science Inventor Guys: Please get off the pot and make some bitchin' tactical-weapon prosthetic legs! Also whenever anyone asks me, I simply say, "Well, he was serving with our forces overseas over in Afghanistan..." and *bam* free drinks! You may ask: do I have no shame? I would ask right back: Uhhh, have you read this blog before?? There are no tears shed here, no regrets, no shame... just beer and lots of it.

And this is precisely what Stevil St Evil and I did
during his stay in Canada - Ontario's finest craft
beers were poured into frosty mugs of enjoyment

But while Steve was here, dammit, I put him to work as we jointly reviewed countless beers in the fridge at Donny's Bar and Grill for commentary in this very space. (And you think your job is hard? Suck it up, buttercup.) Two of those blogs were written back in June and are presently before the judging panel at the Pulitzer Prize headquarters, as well as the Nobel Peace Prize judges because, well, cast your net wide, I say. Our joint reviews, voice-recorded on my Smartphone, veered from erudite to babbling nonsense, emphasis on the latter. Actually, in retrospect, the former never came into play. The waters in our Think Tank run shallow. But a solid week of Day Drinking and reviewing beers with Steve was probably the highlight of my Summer thus far which gives you a good idea of the glorious state of my life. At present, my relationship status on Facebook is: "Trying to take a selfie with the neighbour's cat."

But I jest (not about the cat thing - that's possibly true.) While Steve was here, we held a mini-Humber College Reunion at Donny's Bar and Grill and, bless his wee blackened heart, Beer Bro Glenn did one of his infamous USA-border Beer Runs, as well as scooting around to some of Toronto's finest craft brewers before landing on my patio with a resounding *thud*.

Among the finest Beer Bro Glenn brought to Donny's
Bar and Grill was the Rainhard Lazy Bones IPA,
which is a strong offering from the fledgling brewery

Now because I voice-record all of my reviews on my phone, I decided to clean up the remainders from Steve's visit because I am about to embark on a three-day adventure known as the Burlington Beer Festival and I wanted a clean phone with which to record this little slice of beer history. So have a seat, relax and get ready for Beer O'Clock at Donny's Bar and Grill as I run through the last of those joint beer reviews, questionable language edited out.

Among the Yankee offering Glenn beer-muled here was one from my second-favourite San Diego craft brewer, Ballast Point, who are making a strong case to unseat my favourite, Stone Brewing. (They can brew no wrong.) So it was that a Ballast Point Dorado Double IPA landed in our glasses. So buckle up, the ride's about to begin.
Don: Not getting fruit or anything off the nose, just a big-ass whack of hops. *tasting* Ohhh my gawd, bitter, bitter, bitter. Delicious."
Steve: "I think a citrus just exploded in my mouth. Citruses? Citri?"

Next up was a Rainhard Crazy Bones IPA, courtesy of newcomers Jordan and Katie Rainhard's new west-end Toronto brewery. Now Glenn wrote an outstanding piece on them a few days back so I'll simply attach that link at the end of this and you can read it at your leisure. (Disclaimer: his blog may contain adult situations and course language. Or not. I can't remember.) So that Crazy Bones IPA?

Laden with Saaz hops, this Czech-style pilsner
actually offered Steve and myself a break from
a week where we were basically injecting hops
directly into our veins like vagrant beer junkies

Don: "Sweet smell. Fruit. Oranges. Okay, bitter orange peel on the tongue. This is pretty damn nice."
Steve with his laptop on the patio: "This could be a little hoppier but it's still quite tasty. These guys are obviously pretty new. I'm only seeing five beers on RateBeer so far. So boys, amp up the hops for your inevitable Imperial IPA. More hops!!!"
I think that's New Zealand's motto. While the tiny island(s) used to have "Onward" as their "official" motto, I guess they figured they'd moved forward enough due to being ocean-locked so now they have no motto. From what I've heard, "More hops!" would be appropriate.

Next up from the always-reliable, two-time Canadian Brewery of the Year, Great Lakes Brewery with their Long Dong Pilsner, an almost welcome change-up from a hop-laden week.
Don: "Aroma is fresh and malty."
Steve: "Refreshing, almost like a wheat beer."
Don: "Oh yeah, that's got some back-kick to it. Really good!"
Steve: "It's a tickle-trunk of tasty treats... *laughter* Hey, I think Glenn's obsessed with genitalia. Remember when he couldn't stop talking about (Toronto's Indie Alehouse's) Cock Puncher (Imperial IPA)?"
Don: "It's a phase. All boys go through it."

Just prior to Steve's departure for Vancouver,
we landed at Rib Eye Jack's Ale House where
I enjoyed a Great Lakes Brewery Johnny Simcoe
Pale Ale. Another from their Tank Ten Series.

Don't even get us started on his raving obsession last summer with Fat Tug IPA from Victoria, BC's Driftwood Brewing. We have determined that while, in fact, women have G-Spots, Glenn has an entire G-Zone between his knees and belt. He's a randy lad.

Just before Steve's departure from Toronto to Vancouver where he would promptly lay waste to his buddy Richard's liver, we popped into Rib Eye Jack's Ale House to enjoy a few pints. While Steve went for a Nickel Brook Bolshevik Bastard Stout on tap ("Sweet Baby Jeebus, this is good!"), I opted for another Great Lakes beer, their Johnny Simcoe Pale Ale.
Don: "Some nice citrus on the nose. It's got tropical fruit on the tongue. Another really good beer."
Patron beside me at Rib Eye Jack's Ale: "Why are you talking to your phone?"

And finally from my favourite Grand River, Ontario brewery, Highlander Brewing Co., comes their delightful Scottish Ale.
Don: Okay, I've had this before but Steve's never had it so I'm giving Highlander a two-for-one because I like them a lot. It's got a nice sort of plum on the nose..."

Okay, guys, if this picture of my favourite Beer Technician Kylie
does not encourage you to attend the Burlington Beer Festival
starting tonight, well... I dunno... consult your physician or maybe
a therapist because there's something wrong with your brain-pan.

Steve: "It's subtle and it's well balanced. Beautifully balanced. It's not like an in-your-face Scotch ale but rather, a smooth one. I like this."
Don: "Oh yeah, there's the Scotchy-Scotchy smoothness."

Okay, gang, tonight's the night - the grand opening night of the Burlington Beer Festival at Spencer Smith Park on the lake, running tonight right through to Sunday. I will be planted firmly there for the next three days so unless you're on fire, don't call me. In fact, why call me at all? Call a firefighter. That makes far more sense and as it happens, that camera you carry around also doubles as a phone. No joke. I'll be there tonight with Beer Store Bro Gordo, tomorrow during the day with Other Beer Store Bro Jay-Dawg and finally on Sunday with Glenn and his now-famous G-Zone. It's $35 a night or $75 for the VIP Weekend Pass. Over 30 breweries, a couple of cider-houses and hey, two wine kiosks await your arrival. All of the details can be found at: burlingtonbeerfest.com. It is THE event of the Summer and if you miss it, I will laugh loudly and say straight to your face, "Hey, you missed it."

And remember while you're there, not only are those craft beers delicious, they also fill almost 10% of your daily beer requirements so there's some real Science to be learned here. But guys and dolls, that's it, that's all and I am outta here. As promised, here's that link to Glenn's look at Rainhard Brewery, cleverly called: Glenn's Look At Rainhard Brewery But, as always, until I return from the inevitable stint in Rehab, I remain...

US Open Beer Championships

As far as I'm concerned, THIS is the US Open
that means the most!! No offence meant for
either golf or tennis followers but since I know
none of you are reading this, you can bite me!

Once a year, the best competitors from around the world converge on America with one goal in mind - to win the US Open. No, not the annual golf tournament... no, not the major tennis event - though both of those are certainly cute and adorable endeavours. I'm sorry, that sounded kinda condescending. (If you're a bowler, that means I'm talking down at y'all...)

No, I am, of course, talking about the US Open Beer Championship, which was held Independence Day in Oxford, Ohio. Oxford is ironically home to Miami University and has been since 1809 while Oxford University can be found in Oxford, England. Meanwhile, the University of Miami (they have a preposition for us - this one uses "of") is located in Coral Gables, Florida. The more you know... *starburst*

This year's brewers' bash was a big'un as 4,000 beers (and some ciders) were entered in 90 different classes (meaning roughly 45 entries per category), as well as offering the chance for homebrewers to go up against the pro breweries. That is, if they were a gold medal winner at the previous year's American Homebrewers Association's Homebrew Competition. And for the record, two homebrewers did win this year - a silver in the German Wheat class and a bronze in the Spice Cider categories. So you see, kids, dreams can come true... even if they involve *shudder* cider.

After winning three medals at the US Open
Beer Championship, Nickel Brook owner
John Romano celebrated by riding a
mechanical bull.  (Actually, I have no
idea why he's on this bull or even where
this picture came from. My files contain
any number of weird and wild pictures.)

Now when I tell you breweries come from far and wide to compete in this event, I'm not joking. We're talking world-wide. According to Dow Scoggins, the US Open Director, Josh Deitner of Shanghai Brewery in China "traveled 7,263 miles to deliver his beer personally." And despite the fact that the name Deitner is a little more, well, German than Chinese, the brewery snagged a silver for their Imperial American Brown Ale. Let's assume Josh's German brother, Ho Ming Cho, was also there to celebrate so it's all good.

And there were Ontario winners once again this year. Last year while my Burlington homeboys, Nickel Brook, took two awards, it was tiny Neustadt Springs Brewery that lead the Canuck Assault with four medals. This year the tables turned so while Neustadt won two, both Nickel Brook and the Niagara College Teaching Brewery won three. So before I salute my homeys, let's talk Niagara College and their impressive showing. In the Bitter division, they scored silver for their Butler's Bitter; they took gold for their Brewmaster Stout in the Foreign Stout category and finally a bronze in the American Imperial Pilsner with their Liqueur De Malt, proving definitively if you use French naming a beer, you will win an award. When I open a craft brewery, you will all enjoy my Oui Monsieur Imperial IPA, my Au Revoir Pilsner, my Qui Moi? Porter and of course, my triple-award-winning Qu'est-ce Que C'est Chocolate Cake Stout. For those not fluent in French, my beers are, in order: Yes Sir, Goodbye, Who Me? and What The Hell Is That? Just call them sure-fire award-winners.

This is the first time I've ever reviewed a
non-beer but since it won an award, I
suppose I should really give it the same
consideration that I would to its alcoholic
brethren. Okay, lessee... Very bubble
gummy on the nose, equally bubble
gummy on the tongue, this, too, is what
root beer tastes like? I'm guessing here.

As mentioned, Nickel Brook took to the podium three times, collecting a bronze for Equilibrium in the ESB division, another bronze for their Uber in the Belgian Lambic category (tying a brewery actually from Belgium) and finally a silver for Babbling Brook's in the Non-Alcoholic Root Beer class. Now, Brook is brewery owner John Romano's daughter whereas his son Nick is the Nickle in Nickel Brook. And I can attest to the fact that the siblings put their time in at the brewery. I met young Brook as she was labeling a specialty beer, contracted by a Quebec brewer one day whereas University of Waterloo student Nick has filled my growlers during Summer Break more times than he can even count. Which is saying something since he's majoring in Business and Economics. One day as I was coming in, I saw Nick manning the retail station while his Dad was within earshot. So I bellowed, "Good day, young Nick! I am here once again to pay your tuition!" That got a chuckle from John. (I was joking but in fact, when you shop at your local brewery, that is precisely what you are helping to do.)

At the US Open, Grand River Brewing out of Guelph collected a gold in the Mild British Ale with their Mill Race Mild while Neustadt Springs (Neustadt, Ontario) was right behind them, snagging a silver for their Ever Ard and then following that with a bronze for Mill Gap English Bitter in the Bitter race. Oakville's Cameron's Brewing (another favourite of mine) picked up a bronze in the Brown Ale division with their White Oat Savant while Gravenhurst's Sawdust City Brewing beat all comers in the German Kolsch category, taking gold, Jerry, gold for their Gateway Kolsch. Well done, boys!

This is one hoppy, delicious India Brown
Ale AND it has a spaceship on the label!!!

There are those out there who believe there is no such thing as coincidence (I'm one of them) so it was on July 4th that I popped open a Wellington Brewing (Guelph) Terrestrial India Brown Ale to raise a Canadian toast to America's Independence Day. (To my American readers, you were well-toasted on July 4th... as was I by the end of the day!) Now this takes a basic brown ale formula and puts a pretty unique spin on it. They start with the malts that are core to a good British brown ale but then Brewmaster Marvin Dyck tosses some Amarillo, Chinook, Centennial, Cascade and Sorachi Ace hops into the mix to goose it like a sheet-askew sorority girl staggering through a Toga Party and amping it up to 57 IBUs - international bitterness units. (Disclaimer: this blog does not advocate the goosing of anyone. Particularly me.) So suddenly a plain old brown ale becomes one with a solid 5.9% punch, giving you straight malt caramel richness on the nose but slyly hits the tongue with smoky hops. I was quite impressed with this outing. And within hours of me having it and enjoying the hell out of it, the same beer would be collecting a bronze at the US Open in the American Brown Ale division. Coincidence? I think not. (Now I'm not saying that I psychically willed the beer to win... but on the other hand, feel free to prove I didn't.) A damn tasty ale.

Worthy of note here is that with the exception of a Quebec cider-house, all Canadian winners came from Ontario. Given the strength of the craft beer industry in British Columbia, that surprised the heck out of me. The west coast province seriously kicked ass at the Canadian Brewing Awards just one month ago. Next year...

As well as pictures of the beers themselves, The Chive
website used this picture with their posting of the Top
Ten Canadian Beers to sip this summer. Drinkers will
 be very familiar with some of the winners on this. But
has no one told this young lady WHY we use a glass?

But there were more accolades for Canadian beers when well-known men's website, The Chive, (thechive.com) posted "The Ten Best Canadian Beers To Sip This Summer" on Thursday, complete with accompanying pictures. Veering a little away from their usual girls-in-bikinis-pics format (I check it out daily... so you don't have to. You're welcome), the site, read by four million people daily, looked at some of Canada's best with Ontario once again being the big winner. Singled out was Cameron's Rye Pale Ale ("Bittersweet in taste, totally sweet in existence"), Black Oak Nutcracker Porter ("The sweeter, less hoppy stout goes great with some figgy pudding"), King Pilsner ("One of the tastiest Czech-style brews north of the border") and Amsterdam's Oranje Weisse Premium White ("This brew's light, crisp taste is sweetened with orange and unfiltered") The Chive did slip up a little by relying too heavily on RateBeer when they added Denison's Weissbier, which for the past two years, we have known as Side Launch Wheat.

Here's the deal. When Denison founder Michael Hancock shut down his operation in 2003, he kept two of his beers - the Dunkel and the Weissbier - alive by contracting out their brewing. Why? Because those two beers scored so highly on RateBeer.

It's not Denison's Weissbier anymore. For the past two years, Side Launch
brewmaster (and Denison's founder) Michael Hancock has been brewing
this as Side Launch Wheat, just as his Dunkel is now Side Launch Dark...

So when he joined Collingwood's Side Launch Brewing as their brewmaster in 2013, he brought his two babies with him and they were renamed Side Launch Wheat and Dark. Same great taste, bright new packaging. What did The Chive think of the wheat? "A traditional Bavarian-style brew, the Weissbier is made from a special Bavarian yeast and has spent a decade atop the Hefeweizen category on RateBeer." Well, they're not wrong about that. And it's still just as good now as it was then.

Young Megan posted this Garrison Brewery paddle on
my Facebook wall just three days before the IIPA got
some serious praise on The Chive. Coincidence? Nope.
There is no such thing. The Beer Universe is specific.

But that's only five out of the ten beers. So what non-Ontario beers made the cut? I was thrilled to see one of my favourites, Central City Brewing's (Surrey, BC) Red Racer IPA on the list ("An imperial pale ale with a hoppier taste"). Perhaps Stevil St Evil and my favourite Canadian stout, St-Ambroise (Montreal) Oatmeal Stout cracked the list. I have been singing this stout's praises to anyone who will listen and so far, that's been two random guys at the bus shelter, who may or may not have been homeless. (Baby steps, people, Rome wasn't built in a day.) The Chive's description? "(The brewery) makes this nectar from above with 40% dark malt and roasted barley, along with some oatmeal to give it that gorgeous mocha-coloured head."

I wasn't a bit surprised to see at least one Unibroue (Chambly, Quebec) product on there and it turns out it was their strong 9% ale, La Fin du Monde. "Winning more awards and accolades than any Canadian competitor is a pretty good way to tell people they should try your beer." (This, too, is true.) Now before I continue, I should note I have had all of these beers and have praised them in this very spot. But there were two beers on The Chive's list that I haven't tried.

Garrison's Imperial IPA made The Chive's
list of Canadian Summer Beers You Must Drink

The first was Paddock Wood Brewing's (Saskatoon, Saskatchewan) Black Cat Lager, a dunkel that sounds like it's totally in my wheelhouse. "It comes with a hint of  'delicate coffee notes' which is pretty damn tasty."

But back to the whole "there are no coincidences" thing... Last Monday, my young friend Megan, who lives in Halifax, posted a picture on my Facebook wall of a paddle filled with Garrison Brewing beers (see above). On that paddle? Garrison's Imperial IPA, Nut Brown Ale, a cider that they started brewing two years ago on their 15th anniversary (all yours, Megs), their Seaport Blonde Ale (her Garrison stand-by) and their Raspberry Wheat (her new favourite.) Megan sang all their praises, though I suspect she thought, "That IIPA might be best left in Donny's hands." So which Garrison beer made The Chive's list? Well, that would be the Imperial IPA, (Me: "Be the IIPA. be the IIPA... yay, Chive! Another round of girls in bikinis to celebrate!!!") which was described thusly: "You better like hops to get into this next one. Garrison Brewing claims it is the 'hoppiest beer in Atlantic Canada.' We are willing to stand by that claim."

This weekend, the Burlington Beer Festival at Spencer
Smith Park. If you do NOT attend, let me just say this.
Stealing from Liam Neeson's speech in Taken, "I have a
particular set of skills I have acquired over a very long
career. If you attend, that will be the end of it. I will not
look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will
look for you, I will find you and I will make you drink..."

But Megan isn't going to let Garrison's recent victory stand. She told me (with authority), "With Garrison and Propellor Brewing (also Halifax) taking over the (craft beer) industry out here, I suggest perhaps an east-coast edition of Brew Ha Ha is due to shed the light on smaller, more beloved brands." Well, what the hell? I've done all I can do at that bus shelter with the homeless people so yeah, Megs, I will. This summer. Promise.

Okay, gang at Cheers, this weekend IS the beer event of the Summer - the Burlington Beer Festival. We're talking over 30 craft breweries, two cider-houses, two wine makers (that's a new and cool twist.) It's $35 to get into the best festival that the GTA has to offer and in the wonderful green grassy setting that is Spencer Smith Park in Burlington. Am I excited that this festival quite literally happens at the bottom of the street I live on? That's like asking if my Mom smoked during her pregnancy with me? Of course, she did! Not her fault at all because she was pretty hammered on gin and tonics at the time and we all make bad decisions when we're plastered. But I turned out fine. *Bangs head on wall for no apparent reason* Check it out at: burlingtonbeerfest.com. And if you want to see that salute to Canadian beers on the website, here it is: The Chive Toasts Canada But guys and dolls, that's it, that's all and I am outta here. Until next time, I remain...