Nickel Brook, Cameron's and Kate Upton

Courtesy of CBC, a shot of John Romano, right, and his brother, Peter
at the Hamilton Port Authority this week, announcing the official launch of
the Art & Science Brewing Company in the old Lakeport Brewery building.

This past Wednesday was a pretty big one for craft beer lovers in Hamilton, Burlington... and yes, even the centre of the Canadian Universe, Toronto. Nickel Brook owner John Romano took to the podium at the Hamilton Port Authority and announced that his Burlington brewery and Collective Arts Brewing out of Toronto had joined forces to lease the old Lakeport Brewery on Burlington Street East, effective immediately. The new collaborative craft brewery will be called Arts & Science Brewing Company.

The 50,000-square-foot facility, which used to house Lakeport and prior to them Amstel Canada, is a nifty boost to the area as it will instantly create 20 jobs and then even more employment after the new brewery creates a 10,000-square-foot retail and hospitality area within the building, which will be a venue for live music and art exhibitions. There is absolutely nothing about this that doesn't rock on an AC/DC-level...

Matt Johnston of Collective Arts Brewing addresses the
crowd while John quaffs a pint at the press conference

I caught up with John at Nickel Brook on Friday and he happily noted that yes, "I have signed away my life!" First into the building will be a clean-up crew who have a July deadline to pretty the old gal up. Then they will be hauling in and setting up all the brewing equipment they bought when Sleeman shut down its Maritime operation last year. "We will be up and running by winter," John told me. And creating even more new beers, not to mention continuing the strong lines they already have. Beer Musketeer Glenn lives and dies by Collective Arts' Rhyme & Reason Pale Ale while I always have growlers of my favoured Nickel Brook Headstock IPA in the fridge at Donny's Bar and Grill. So by happy coincidence, what's good for the Beer Musketeers is also good for the craft beer community-at-large and hell, society itself, right? (It's a little frightening that I actually believe that...) Ahem, moving on...

Late last month, Cameron's Brewing in Oakville added
growlers to their arsenal. When I can't get to Oakville
to refill mine, the boys at Nickel Brook have no issue
refilling it with their fresh brew. I get the feeling that not
every brewery would do that. Hence, Nickel Brook rocks

When I wrote a Christmas Wish List blog last December, one of my wishes was that Cameron's Brewery would start filling growlers. The brewery, just down the street from my Mom's house, has a retail component but never had growlers. On the last Thursday of every month, Cameron's hosts a Cask Night with live music and, well... ♫ fun, fun, fun 'til her Daddy takes her T-Bird away...♫ (Oh, for crap's sake, just Google it...) Anyway, at their April 24 Cask Night, Cameron's unveiled their growlers. Within the week I was there, getting one filled with their outstanding Rye Pale Ale. Well, after I fertilized my Mom's front lawn. I will be refilling it today after wishing my Mom a Happy Mother's Day. That my growler is empty and needs refilling is simply a happy coincidence. While I would be happy to take credit, I'm gonna assume the monthly Cask Night revellers have also been making the same request of the brewery - "Please get growlers." So they finally did. As it's straight from the brewery's tap, you will never get fresher beer than you do in growlers. And before I get to the beers, a personal milestone...

Is Kate Upton responsible for the success of Brew Ha Ha?

Sometime while I was at work on Friday, Brew Ha Ha got its 10,000th hit. I honestly don't know if that's a lot for a beer blog. I mean, I gotta think beer is a pretty highly Googled thing. (The blog tracker also tells you entry points - my Big Three? Facebook, Google and Twitter...) Doesn't mean the hammered frat-boy in Kentucky actually read it - just means he drunkenly clicked on it, right? And then woke up in the morning and realized it wasn't porn. I have cranked out, on average, one of these a week. In fact, this is the 46th one in what may be 46 weeks since I started on June 22... if my Math is right. (Note to self, increase blog output - still a kazillion beers to try.) However, as I pointed out to Beer Musketeer Stevil St Evil, at least 100 of those hits are me going back into a blog to clean up typos and grammar errors.

But my eagle-eyed buddy Joe pointed something out to me recently on Facebook. If you Google Image "Kate Upton and beer", the second image is the one you see above here to the right. It is also directly linked to my blog written last summer "Drinking Guinness with my Brother", which used this picture. Twice.

Kate Upton playing Flip Cup on the Late Night
with Jimmy Fallon Show. She won handily...
And hey, yet another picture of Kate Upton!

Every week or so, I review the blog stats and while the most recent ones are always at the top of the list, that Guinness blog is, week in and week out, on the list usually in 7th or 8th place. In all honesty, I had forgotten the Upton pic was in it - twice, did I say that? - and assumed the word "Guinness" was getting all those Google hits. So actually, the world's foremost swimsuit model has artificially inflated this blog's hit numbers which isn't fair because her stunning beauty aside (there ain't nuthin' artificially inflated about Kate Upton), that has nothing to do with beer... so I should be ashamed of myself.

Let me just say this then. Justin Bieber is a dick. Sofia Vergera naked. Free beer. Free craft beer. Kate Upton and beer. Kate Upton naked. Kate Upton swimsuit. How to make Meth at home. Free money. Brazilian beach volleyball women.

There. That should keep this blog Google-buzzing for a while and get me a fresh batch of hits. And yes, I would be ashamed except my shame gland never fully formed as an infant and was replaced instead with a "don't give a damn" gland. Don't hate me - I'm an anomaly of modern Medical Science. *Chugs beer, belches loudly and shrugs* It would also appear I have a stainless-steel liver. You are welcome to hate me for that. I expect that.

Our Muskoka's Detour IPA gets a big challenge from the
Founder's All Day IPA. But I have to give this the edge

Okay, as mentioned last blog, Beer Musketeers Glenn and Cat crash-landed (quite literally in Glenn's case) at Donny's Bar and Grill on Easter Monday for an afternoon of debauchery of the highest order. Glenn, who had just returned from a Florida vacation with his son, The J Man, brought us a whole bunch of hard-to-find-here American craft beers. My first offering: Founder's Brewing All Day IPA, which at 4.7% is a session IPA, designed not to send you to an alcohol-induced IPA Nap-Time. Pine and grapefruit on the nose, it hits the tongue with more pine and grassy goodness. It was a beautiful warm day on the patio and I could quite literally see myself drinking this well into the evening. Founders, out of Grand Rapids, Michigan, has brewed up this stunning winner.

Holy crap on a stick! Stone's Ruination
IPA is one of the best I've ever had...

Although Nickel Brook's Immodest Imperial IPA was unanimously declared "Best Of Show" by the Beer Musketeers, Stone Brewery out of Escondido, California brews one called Ruination IPA that was, in my opinion, its equal. Tropical fruit and yet no pine, citrus or grapefruit on the nose (an IPA rarity), all of those come through in the mouth. At 100+ IBUs (international bitterness units) and 8.2%, this does not dance on the tongue - it goes full Mixed Martial Arts on it. Hell, I think I lost a tooth. In fact, here's Stone's own commercial description of their Ruination IPA...

"We would say that no hops were injured in the brewing of this beer but that would be a massive lie. In fact, the words 'Stone Ruination IPA' are what older hop vines use to cause little hop vines to quiver with fright and lose sleep at night. We at Stone honor the brutal massacre of countless hops with this 'Liquid poem to the glory of the hop!' Paganism at its best!" On the back label, Stone's clever copywriter basically disses you as not being worthy to hold such an outstanding beer in your ape-like hand while making you feel like you've joined some special Secret Society. What can I say - the 100 on RateBeer says it better than I can.

Once called "perhaps the best IPA in America" by
Esquire magazine, I suspect others have caught up

One more big winner before we get to a few "Hmmm, that was interesting" ones. Straight from Dogfish Head Brewery in Milton, Delaware came the 90 Minute Imperial IPA. Another 100 on RateBeer, this comes close to Ruination... but not quite. Don't get me wrong - it's damn good but had the misfortune of following Ruination in the batting circle. At 9% and 90 IBUs, its aroma is both citrus and (oddly) malt while the taste is hops, malts and citrus. Glenn also had their 120 Minute IPA in Florida (99 on RateBeer) and said it was even better. I suspect I would flip the scores between the two but either way, neither is a slouch. Like I said, big winner here. And a very cool brewery name. Full props, boys!

He'Brew Bittersweet Lenny Rye IPA (Lenny is a nod to comedian Lenny Bruce) out of Schmaltz (I kid you not) Brewing Company in Clifton Park, NY, was an interesting one but I think good interesting. Both spicy and malty on the nose, the taste is strong citrus hops but all of us preferred the Cameron's Rye Pale Ale. Still pretty decent though.

Kate Upton! Kate Upton! Kate Upton!
(Blatant blog hit ploy on my end...)

The final American entry was New Belgium Brewing Company's (Fort Collins, Colorado) Ranger IPA. Although a solid 95 on RateBeer, to hopheads such as the Beer Musketeers, it was the second weakest of the day. Pinecones and citrus on the nose, this 6.5%, 70 IBU was sort of malty and lightly fruity on the tongue. Good but not good enough to share a table with Ruination and Immodest.

Finally, out of Glenn's own 5 Paddles Brewing Company in Whitby came The Hipster IPA. Trying to find the right words here... ummm, okay, how about: WTF, guys? As a IPA lover who has drank a tanker-trailer full of both good and less good ones over the year, I remain staggered by this one. Who on Earth told you to use dirty dishwater in the brewing process? This is the "Two Girls, One Cup" of IPAs. Sorry, that's all I got...

Okay, I wanted to include the Walkerville IPA that co-worker Marie brought me home from Windsor, as well as the Honest Lager she brought for former co-worker Louise but Nickel Brook, Cameron's and Kate Upton, Kate Upton and Kate Upton bounced the Walkerville brews to the next one, as well as countless other goodies like Flying Monkeys The Matador Version 2.0 Imperial Dark Rye Ale, Hop City's Big Mouth Pale Ale, Arch's Dinner Jacket O'Red IPA, Hopus Strong Blonde Ale from Belgium, as well as something called Vulcan Ale which may be better suited to poisoning the Romulan hordes.

Okay, ladies and germs, that's it, that's all and I am outta here!!! Until next time, I remain...

Katie does Vegas; the Beer Musketeers invade

When you work with my little girl, Katie, you end
up in a lot of selfies and random pictures. Their
generation has perfected selfies as a medium...

When my young co-worker, Katie, went off to Las Vegas for the first time recently, it seemed only natural that she would turn to me for some Vegas Strip guidance. For one, I'm a five-time Vegas veteran because, well, it's pretty much my favourite place in the world, even though the place doesn't make much off me in terms of gambling. Five trips, maybe $100 gambled, won $104 once so I'm a bit of a Vegas rarity - Mr Break-Even.

The other reason is simply that I'm like a second Dad to her. I first met her a little over six years ago when I was dating her best friend's Mom. Things changed but the friendship with Katie and her best friend Meagan very much remained. So much so, I helped Katie get a job at my Beer Store where she's turned out to be a huge asset, as I knew she would. At the tender age of 23, she's my little girl. (Consider that fair warning, young playahs...) Anyway, just this week, my "daughter" went back to Nursing training in Toronto so we'll only get her on weekends. That's why she's kicking this off... a "Dad's Tribute"... which equals pride. And fun stories of my daughter's adventures. (She's a great kid and I love her to bits...)

A Katie and Meagan Vegas selfie taken in this huge ferris-
wheel viewing-pod thing that didn't exist the last time I was
there in 2012. Again, the medium perfected by these two...

So a couple of days before they left, I emailed both the girls a Donny's Guide to the Las Vegas Strip, complete with casino/hotel map and directions of where to buy cheap beer/liquor, where NOT to buy drinks (any casino), fun spots and frankly, where to avoid. Also when you party hard all day, crash at 5 p.m., wake up at 1 or 2 a.m., why that is the best time to clean up and head right back out onto the strip. When she asked me how much cash she should take on their 3-night, 4-day trip, I suggested $300 should be more than enough. "Pretty young women don't pay much for booze in Vegas," I noted. That confused her and I never elaborated but she soon understood why.

Damn, I love this place. Gotta go back there soon.
Just hearing Katie's stories made me miss this city...

After landing in Planet Hollywood Hotel, the pair frequented the Koi Nightclub where it is "All You Can Drink for $20" but only for women! Why is that? Because pretty young ladies bring all the boys to the yard... ♫ and I say it's better than yours... ♫ Sorry, got musically sidetracked - it couldn't be helped. However, the bar is clever enough not to include either beer or liqueur shooters because young girls, even at their petite size, can drink $20 worth of beer or liqueur but cheap American liquor? Not a chance. And the guys pay full-freight - anywhere from $10-$18 for beers, mixed drinks, whatever. That's why the Pretty Girl Quotient is important to hotspots in Vegas like Koi - they draw in the guys, who drop a bundle. Even in the Vegas nightclubs, the odds favour the house. The pair found out just how important the Pretty Girl Quotient was when they arrived one night and realized they only had $20 between them. As they turned to go back to the room, a bouncer rushed over to ask why they weren't coming in. They explained they were simply going to get more money. Next thing they knew, they were handed a "Two for $20" card and in they happily went. The nightclub was taking no chances on the girls somehow not returning.

Three of Nickel Brook's newest offerings, enjoyed by the
Beer Musketeers at Donny's Bar and Grill on Easter Monday.
Actually, scratch the Equilibrium ESB. I accidentally drank all
of that the night before while Skyping with Stevil St Evil...

Suffice it to say, they had a blast. I was getting excited texts literally the second Katie had landed back on Canadian soil. But the exact same day the girls flew out to Vegas (Easter Monday), Donny's Bar and Grill played host to two of the Beer Musketeers, Glenn and Cat, and later in the increasingly-wobbly afternoon, Stevil St Evil, straight from Wellington, New Zealand, courtesy of Skype on my laptop. I hadn't been on Skype in maybe four years when I last talked to my brother Gary in Vietnam so naturally, I couldn't remember my Skype name or password. So the night before the Musketeer arrival, Stevil tracked my account down and connected to me. From there, it was simply a matter of getting a new password from Skype and *bam* I was back on it.

Musketeer Glenn enjoying his first
Nickel Brook Immodest Imperial IPA
which was the biggest hit of the day

However, we thought it best to give Skype a test-run that night so I connected with the vacationing Stevil where it was the following afternoon for him. Steve was set up nicely with a growler of his beloved Aro Noir Stout made by his local crafters, Garage Project, while on my end, I basically started piling into the many IPAs I have bought for the Musketeers visit the next day. We had a great chat but... ♫ Oops, I did it again... ♫ (Apparently, I'm feeling musically-inclined today? And with pretty catchy but crappy pop songs to boot.) Yes, I drank most of the Musketeer beer. So knowing they were landing at 2 p.m., I decided, "They're coming to Burlington (from Toronto and Oshawa) so dammit, they're gonna drink Burlington beer," and proceeded happily to Nickel Brook where I stocked right back up. I had two growlers of Headstock IPA, as well as cans of Immodest Imperial IPA, cans of Malevolent Black Imperial IPA, bottles of Naughty Neighbour American Pale Ale and countless other odds and sods still in the fridge. I was set. Plus Glenn, having just returned from Florida, arrived with a knapsack filled with hard-to-find-here American craft beers.

Screen-shot view of the Beer Musketeers from Stevil's end in New Zealand.
As you can see, it was a sophisticated and dignified affair on the patio at
Donny's Bar and Grill. What can I say? We do Easter Monday right...

After appetizers of Headstock and Naughty Neighbour, we jumped into the Malevolent - Glenn's (and perhaps Cat's - I'm not sure) first foray into black IPAs. Using Simcoe, Columbus and Centennial hops, this beer is deceptive as hell. With a light coffee scent, it seems like a porter or even a stout on the nose but on the tongue, hoppy as hell with grapefruit, citrus and pine. So that's the deceptive part - it looked like you're gonna drink a porter, smelled like you're gonna drink a porter... but once it hit your tongue? Yes, that's an IPA. And a damn good one. Met with universal acclaim - everyone raved.

Screen-shot of how we must have looked to Stevil St Evil...

Funny Glenn vs Skype Sidebar #1: Stevil, an old hand at Skype, decided to both screen-shot and record chunks of the afternoon shenanigans - three videos of roughly 10-20 minutes each. Since we had a good two hours jump on him, we were in worse shape with each recording. And folks, it was damn funny. Let's start with Glenn... and then continue with... Glenn. Not even 10 minutes after we powered down the Malevolent, Glenn exclaimed to Steve (on camera), "I have to try a black IPA some day!" The empty Malevolent can is literally sitting in front of him. Okay, just after that point, I bring out the Jewel of the Nile... Nickel Brook's Immodest Imperial IPA.

Glenn wraps his head around Skype while waiting to yell at
Steve. Glenn's volume is 11. He's very Spinal Tap that way

Remember, when a couple of blogs back, I referred to Flying Monkeys' Shoulders of Giants IIPA as the best Canadian IIPA I'd ever had? Yeah, turns out Shoulders has an evil twin brother and his name is Immodest. There's good... and then there's crazy good. Nickel Brook Brewmaster Ryan apparently decided life does not come with limits and brewed up this Spawn of Satan. Limited time so I'm thrilled they got a chance to have it. I'd already indulged but Glenn and Cat? Blown away. Ryan has incorporated what he calls "an obscene use of Citra and Simcoe hops" to create a 9.5%, 85 IBU punch in the face. Citrus on the nose, earthy pine on the tongue, this bastard was the bomb. Everyone declared it "Best of Show."

My buddy, Joe, put this on my
wall and said, "This is the beer
Gotham needs." Weird, it's like
people think I worship Batman or
something. Oh, right, never mind

That brings me to Glenn vs Skype Sidebar #2: Okay, after Glenn insisted (okay, demanded loudly) that Stevil start drinking, completely not realizing that Stevil had just woken up, was drinking coffee and was 16 hours ahead of us... in the early morning his time... he finally showed his lack of Skype understanding by looking at Stevil in my laptop and asking (quite under the influence)... "Wait... so is this in real time?" As opposed to... fake time? By the end of it all, Glenn caught up but man, in the meanwhile, he made us all laugh. But that's life as a Musketeer. You mock, you get mocked. What a great afternoon (and morning) we all had. Here's Glenn's take on the shenanigans: Man, Am I Loud! He's a little rough on himself. It was great fun. And it was the afternoon/early evening. Volume doesn't count.

Okay, more beers coming. Glenn - thank you, dude - brought the party a crap-load of hard-to-get-here IPAs from his trip to Florida and they're next. My co-worker, Marie, recently went on a trip with better half, Ernie, to Caesar's Palace in Windsor, won a crap-load of money and wandered down the street to craftie Walkerville Brewery where she got me both a sick glass and a litre of their IPA. Ernie, for his part, supplied the jalapeno cheddar sausages he created for J&G Quality Meats in Burlington that we slammed down at this little IPA-Fest! (Blatant plug: 175 Plains Road East in Burlington - 905-634-0196 - Ernie makes the best stuff!!! Plus he's one of the coolest dudes going... and his chick is pretty fly, too...)

Okay, like I said, more beer news coming this weekend. Two things. Number 1: I have wayyyy too much fun in my life and I may have been blessed with friends that I do not deserve... but hell, I'll take them for granted, anyway. And number 2: guys and dolls, that's it, that's all and I am outta here... As always, I remain...

Sleeman Brewery not hiding its notorious past

Way back when I interviewed John Sleeman in 1996
or so, this is exactly what he looked like. In fact, my
photo of him was set up so similarly, I think this
library photo might actually be mine. If not... close.

Way back in 1995, I became the editor of the Oakville Journal community newspaper after stints as editor for a couple of smallish Toronto newspapers. The Oakville job was preceded by those larger-circulation Toronto papers but followed by editor posts on even smaller circulation papers in a couple of even tinier communities.

Except for a six-month contract stint as a copy editor on the daily Toronto Sun sometime in the early-90s, I never worked at a big paper - in fact, they got smaller as I went along...

So do good things come in small packages? Not really. Long hours, no showers, sucky low paycheques that bounced with alarming frequency... you name it. I remember a funny little Danish man (usually blotto by noon), who owned one of the Toronto papers, had a unique response to bouncing one of my cheques. Me: "My cheque bounced." Him: "Yeah, I coulda told you that was gonna happen." Me: "Why not tell me?" Him: "Thought you'd get mad." Me: "I am mad!" Him: "Yeah, I can see that. Can I buy you a beer?" Me: "A beer?" Him: "Okay, a couple." See? That's my problem - everyone knows my Kryptonite. On the positive side, the small papers came with an incredible amount of editorial freedom and, well... let me just say I remember, at one point, doing the horoscopes. If you were an Aquarius, like me, every week was a good week. Any other sign? All bad, up to and including a predicted demise in a most gruesome manner. That Danish publisher? Once he got: "You're an ass. Not the donkey kind. Pay your employees." (Yup, his horoscope got printed.)

How Sleeman looks these days - ever the dashing brewer!

Anyways, back to that Oakville paper. Community newspapers write about municipal council, budgets, road repairs, local crime... that sort of thing. Not exciting but people read it anyway. So when John Sleeman moved to Oakville in, I believe, 1996, I jumped at the chance to interview him at his Guelph brewery because he now had an Oakville "hook", as we called it. A beer story!! Finally!!! Someone else would have to cover the strawberry social that afternoon - I was driving to Beer Heaven.

John, himself, turned out to be an engaging and charming story-teller - part of which revolves around the fact he had a helluva story to tell. For starters, in the 1600s, the Slymans (as they were then known) were beer-making pirates. Actual Jack Sparrow-type pirates but beer, not rum.  After a couple of centuries, even though pirate business be good, arrrrr, they decided to go legit, changed their name to Sleeman (because who's gonna crack that code?) and opened bars in England.

Al Capone: "Me and dah boys loves us our
Sleeman's beer. Fresh Canadian well water!"

Eventually, his great-great-grandfather John came to Canada in 1836 and started a brewery in St Catherine's. Because the Industrial Age was in full-swing, the water in St Kitt's was sketchy so he shifted operation to Guelph where they could tap fresh spring well water. His son, George, took over the business in 1867, Canada's founding year. And so they continued on successfully, son to son. Well, until the Canadian Temperance Act reared its ugly head in 1916, forcing brewers to sell only ginger ale and malt. Fortunately, at that point, one of the Sleeman brothers in charge found a profitable sideline, harkening back to their pirate days. They started to bootleg beer to the USA... notably the Detroit and Chicago areas... and even more notably to Al Capone. That was, of course, a double-edged sword in 1933. Incredibly lucrative... but even more so, incredibly illegal. The Canadian government found out and shut them down cold - banning them from making beer for 50 years! Let's face it - even the pirate Slymans got a better deal than that. Granted, no record of them ever being caught... arrrr, scurvy dogs that they be...

Sleeman Brewery in 1850 with the family homestead, left

This was not an issue for John's folks who were abstainers. According to him, the brewery history was never mentioned in the household as he was growing up. He never knew. But he told me even if he had known his family's brewing past, he wouldn't have cared. At 17, he set off for his own to England in the hopes of establishing pubs. Never happened. British banks were reluctant to bankroll the upstart Canadian guy. However, returning here with a British wife, he decided to create a British pub here in the mid-70s. This time, British brewers - big ones - were more than willing to export their product to him, a rarity in Canada at that time.

The Sleeman Brewery now, Canada's third-largest brewer

Another small problem? Distribution of British beer in Canada was illegal unless you had the proper authorization. He didn't so he cut a deal with the government that allowed him to do so but over the years, he began to wonder if it might not be more profitable to dump the British bar and use his (now considerable) connections to start distributing British beer in Canada, even though the government would have taken a huge cut. (Anyone else thinking the government is simply a better organized, legal version of, well, gangsters or even pirates? Well, that is, unless my MP is reading this because you, sir, are a saint in a three-piece suit. A saint, I say... Note to self: find out who my MP is and if need be, Eddie Haskell that suit reference to "lovely dress.")

The OTHER thing Sleeman is notorious for: their clear
bottles. You know, after the pirates and bootleggers...

Well, here's where things get interesting, or at least more so. Turns out a great-aunt of his had been saving that brewery recipe book all those years and presented it to him, imploring him to restart the family's brewing tradition. Much reluctance on John's end - no one starts a brewery because someone hands them a recipe book. Well, okay, I would... but no one sane. But he did, regardless, restarting the brewery in 1988, less than five years after their 50-year ban expired. Since then, through numerous acquisitions, they have become the third-largest brewer in Canada behind Labatt's and Molson. While I was interviewing John in 1996, he was on the verge of buying BC's Okanagan Spring Brewery (which he did a couple of months later); in 1998, they bought up Toronto's Upper Canada Brewing in 1998, Maritime Brewing in 2000 and then, from where I'm sitting, the biggest jewel in their crown, Quebec's outstanding Unibroue in 2004.

This is definitely one of their best, included in their Spring
Selection pack. Then, their Silver Creek Lager and Porter

Then in 2006, turn-about became fair play. According to John in a Canadian Business Journal story, the two Canadian big brewery boys were sniffing around Sleeman and he feared it would not be a pleasant experience - that the brewery, now a player albeit a smaller one, would get bought out... and then shut down. To that end, Sleeman said he found a "white knight" in Japanese giant, Sapporo, who bought them out for $400 million - a deal that left him in charge of the Canadian operations and kept their 1,000-plus employees with jobs, his biggest fear.

So what is Sleeman's place on the Great Canadian Beer Landscape? That depends. If you're a mainstream beer drinker, Sleeman's is considered the "Fancy Dan" stuff. If you're a craft beer drinker, they are considered mainstream, notably because they have 2% of The Beer Store (something made possible by the Sapporo acquisition.)

How does Sleeman deal with their sketchy past?
Well, they use it in their radio ads, for starters!

So how's their beer? Some really good... some less so. Throw RateBeer out of the window for this one. They get panned hugely there. Their best, by far, is their Bock, which I just had for the first time recently. This is not a heavy bock, nor should it be. Caramel on the nose, an interesting bittersweet malt on the tongue. For a larger brewer, this is precisely the bock you want to make, one that may sway a few mainstream drinkers to the, well, dark side. After that, I'll offer up two more I enjoy - their Fine Porter and Silver Creek Lager. The Fine Porter is based on the porters founder John Sleeman used to drink in England. Chocolate and lightly nutty on the nose, it's also nutty on the tongue and a tad bitter. Had I had better porters? Yes, a few from the crafties. Have I had any porters with more history behind them? After all, this is the exact same recipe that was brewed in the 1800s. No. Not even close. So props...

Sorry, RateBeer, this is one of my favourite Canadian lagers.

Okay. Silver Creek Lager (Silver Creek was one of the brewery's 1800s names). I have always been a fan of this beer. Back when I interviewed John, as I was exiting through the retail area, he stopped me and said, "No one leaves here without a 'thank you'," gesturing towards their beer and clothing. I left with a 12-pack of Silver Creek and a sick sweatshirt. I didn't have the heart to tell him that in community newspapers, unless you were on the front paper for something illegal, all business stories were what we called "fluffy bunnies", meaning their stories were told with great deference. And by "didn't have the heart", I mean, I got paid squat... so freebies always welcome. To me, for what many would consider mainstream lager, I think this is one of the cleanest, crispest ones going. I don't drink lagers much anymore but I would always drink this one. It's damn tasty.

A good dark beer but not an
outstanding one. That said, hand
me one, I will  happily drink it...

In the middle of the Sleeman's pack is their Dark ale, a beer that is solid but not blow-your-mind-good, like, say, Mill Street Tankhouse. I am a fan of their Original Draught, simply because on a hot day at Donny's Bar and Grill, a draft goes down easily on the patio. But these days, a hard-core IPA or punchy pale ale goes down just as easy. The Sleeman IPA is a malt-driven, hops-free British-style IPA, not surprising given the brewery's roots - but I think we know I shun those for the American style hop-bombs. The Cream Ale, their second best seller, suffers with me simply because that's my least-favoured kind of ale (other company's, including crafties, do not fare any better with me) and the Honey Brown Lager does not stack up well against some of the amber lagers out there I love, such as Barking Squirrel.

Beyond that, both the Sleeman Light and the low-carb Sleeman Clear I've never had because well, those styles don't appeal to me. They might well be excellent in those categories but the honest truth is I'll never know. They both sell well, especially the Clear - that much I know.

And that is the story of Sleeman Brewery. Pirates. Bootleggers. The little train that could. And for all three of those things, I have no small amount of admiration for John and his crew. And here's a reason why. Okay, think craft beer will always be the little guy in the room? Think again. In Portland, Oregon, they just surpassed the big national brewers as the bigger sellers in the first major American market ever. Check it out here: Crafties kicking ass in Portland Remember, my friends at Flying Monkeys, Amsterdam, Mill Street and, of course, my homeboys, Nickel Brook... that was Sleeman in 1988 - look where they are now. It's a big market... with evolving tastes. And as a beer drinker, buoys and gulls, the more the merrier...

Okay, gang, next time, Katie goes to Vegas and the Beer Musketeers (including Stevil St Evil in New Zealand) invade Donny's Bar and Grill. But until then, guys and dolls, that's it, that's all and I am outta here! As always, I remain...

So... 4/20 and why some IPAs are so unhoppy

Okay, that's easier to remember...

It happened every single year from childhood to adulthood. Because my birthday is February 14th, everybody remembers it. My brother, Gary, who lives in Valencia, Spain (and has lived in various points in Europe since 1986) sends me birthday greetings via email without fail. Every year. Like a good brother should.

But his birthday, April 20th, went by every year without well-wishes from my end. Why? I didn't remember what day his birthday was. Eventually, about 15 years ago, he grew tired of telling me it already had been his birthday the day after his actual birthday and said, "Look, April 20th is also Hitler's birthday. You should remember that, right?" And, of course, I didn't because... who the hell would remember Hitler's birthday, for gawd's sake??? Well, besides maybe Eva Braun... and perhaps Heinrich Himmler? The point is, not many...

Sometimes hops smell a lot like marijuana because they're in
the same botanical family. I only know this because I pay
attention in class. Meaning craft brewery tours in my case...

Finally, a couple of years ago, Gary, totally exasperated at this point, said, "Look, in North America, do they have 4/20 Day?", referring, of course, to the day everyone is supposed to smoke marijuana for the betterment of society or well, just because... Well, duh, of course I have heard of 4/20. It was invented by California students way back in 1971 and has been celebrated every April 20th (and other days, I hear) since that time. Suffice it to say, I have not forgotten Gary's birthday since.

So why bring up marijuana in a beer blog? Two reasons. #1) Don't lie. It's a helluva hook. And #2) There's at least one strain of hops that smells, well, pretty much exactly like marijuana. I, of course, only know this from that wafting pungent odour at the many rock concerts I have attended over the years. True story... *coughs smoke* If, for medical reasons, I were forced to use marijuana, the prescription would have to come from a proctologist for the simple reason that my ass ain't stoned yet. Aside from that, I'm too busy chasing beers, not buds (and definitely not Buds...)

Okay, now it's starting to make sense to me. Took me a while
to try a Wells IPA but after that, the pieces fell into place...

The fact that I know there's a hop that smells like that comes courtesy of my Amsterdam Brewery tour back at the beginning of the year with Beer Musketeer Cat where we were handed dried, compressed hops to smell. When your first thought is: "Anyone here have rolling papers?", well, maybe - just maybe -that's a familiar smell. But I'll be honest, the pungency of that particular hop got me to wondering why some IPAs are not hoppy in the least, tasting more like lagers to me than IPAs. Sleeman's IPA, Mill Street's Curious Parrot IPA, Brick's Waterloo IPA, Big Rock IPA and any number of others, I drank and thought, okay, that's a pretty decent beer but not an IPA. I mean, even my very-beer-knowledgeable but Hop-Intolerant coworker Saga could drink these, except that his anti-IPA Shields are set to 11 and nothing with the initials IPA can penetrate them. But for me, it got to the point that I actually wrote about the confusing (to me) non-hop-driven Alexander Keith's IPA last November in a blog called: When Is An IPA Not Really An IPA?

Well, Morpheus, I'd start by saying you're wrong. And
while you're cool, you'll never be Samuel L Jackson Cool...

So after Amsterdam Brewery, I started researching. At the same time, I bought a Wells IPA from Britain, thinking, "Well, they invented the IPA so this'll be hoppy as hell." Nope, another mild, malt-driven one. Or as I call them, SFS IPAs - safe for Saga. Well, it didn't take long to find out the answer - less than a day, to be honest. Turns out there are two kinds of IPA. The British IPAs which are mild and malt-driven light ales... and the North American IPA, which are intense, hop-driven, blow-the-top-off-your-head bitter... well, to varying degrees. You know, the kind I like...

Okay, so now we're talkin' my kind of IPA...

To that end, that renders my "When is an IPA not an IPA?" blog, which was famous among tens of people, I'm sure, to somewhat more infamous status. Because I was wrong. Keiths has every right to call itself an IPA... in the British style. (If it's top-fermented. I'll be honest - I still have my doubts.) But that's kind of the point of starting this blog for me last June - to learn more about beer since that is my livelihood. And much like every other aspect of my life, when I am wrong... man, do I swing for the fences. Granted, I don't really care. In fact, being wrong bothers me so little that Frasier Crane could plan his retirement around me. As I'm busy being wrong on occasion (okay, that word should be plural), I've also drank a truckload of new beers of all kinds... and if loving them is wrong, I don't wanna be right. (I feel a song in there somewhere.) So will I erase that erroneous blog from existence? Hells no. Bite me. I don't mind being wrong at all... And this is why...

Even the Ontario Brewing Awards waited until 2011 to break the IPA category into two separate ones: British IPA and North American IPA because, well, (again I'm assuming) the hoppy North American style ones were sweeping the awards and the malty British style ones had to sit at that awful table near the kitchen where every time the waiters came out, the back of their chairs got hit... and they spilled their malt-driven IPAs down the front of their pants. And the thuggish North American-style IPAs laughed at them for soiling themselves. Good thing the British style ones have that whole "stiff upper lip" thing happening.

... because that's what most North American IPAs taste like
to non-IPA drinkers. Because they're weiners and wussies.

So from this day forth, if I am referring to an IPA, please note I absolutely mean the hoppy North American style IPA. If it's a British style, I will actually say something like, "a milder, malt-driven British-style IPA." I'll be honest, though - don't expect to hear that too much.

So are all British IPAs mild and malt-driven? Okay, as the stunning Elizabeth Montgomery in her role as Samantha Stevens used to charmingly say in the beloved 1960s TV sitcom, Bewitched, "Welllll?" Meaning, no, not quite. Because in my drinking hand (the right hand, of course - the new King Slayer since Jamie Lannister lost his) as we speak is a Thornbridge Halcyon Imperial IPA, found at the LCBO, straight from Bakewell, England. (Bakewell? And now we're back to marijuana... does anyone have any Cool Ranch Doritos in this room???)

Are all British-based IPAs mild and malt-driven? Well, no...

Because this is a beer blog and I should include at least include one beer review, here we go. Citrus (big-time citrus) on the nose, the head hung in for quite a while (not so hard with me), mango, grapefruit, a wee bit of pineapple on the tongue... ladies and germs, we have us one North American-style British IPA. And for the record, I'm not crying. It's finally Spring in Canada... and my allergies are flaring up. It's not pride. I feel pride in my son's accomplishments, especially sports, not some British beer's accomplishments in the field of North American-style IPAs. What? It's a good beer!!! It got 98 on RateBeer which I cautiously trust for good IPAs and Imperial Stouts... and not really for other styles.

Okay, no shout-outs because I just cranked one of these out a couple of days backs... so no one to shout out to.

New Zealand Beer Writer and Blogger Neil with Bruce
the Bulldog. Neil's 3-point stance? Due to Hop Zombie

But I do have a Birthday Wish from Canada for one dude, New Zealand Beer Writer and Blogger Neil Miller. When I started this little blog last June, college chum Stevil St Evil told me, "Read this guy. Seriously. He knows his stuff." Turns out "knows his stuff" was a wee bit understated. That said, he cranks out very brilliant beer blogs with alarming frequency... and I enjoy every single one. Especially his footnotes which, well... you know how people say "LOL"? I actually do laugh out loud. And I have learned more from this dude than I care to admit. So... a lot. Happy birthday to you from Canada (yesterday to you) from a fan, a friend and a brother from another mother. Keep on keeping on.

Okay, no other shout-outs but here's a cool video of a dog protecting his master's beer that co-worker Marie showed me in something I'll call: It's Bud Light. Dogs can't read And another from my friend Joe where a guy uses a photo-copier to do what I would love to with Flying Monkeys Smashbomb Atomic IPA in another called: Why Has Science Not Perfected This?

Okay, gang, next time, the Sleeman's Saga and more. But 'til then, guys and dolls, that's it, that's all and I am outta here... Until next time, I remain...

The Beer Musketeers... and happy Euro-finds

A clever cheeky ad for average Euro-fare

Right now on Facebook, there's a long-running four-way conversation between the Four Beer Musketeers - myself, college chums Glenn and Stevil St Evil and relative newbie to the collective Cat, the lone female who should get some special deference if only due to gender... but hey, if you wanna aim that high, start with world peace, having a fire-breathing pet dragon (thank you, Game of Thrones for adding that to my Bucket List... you bastards) and an episode of The Bachelor where just one of the women finally realizes a buff dude in a big mansion making out with 24 different ladies may not be marriage-material. That said, Cat fits right in due to a love of fine craft beer, not to mention an occasional over-the-line turn-of-phrase on her end. Plus every collective needs a den mother. Poor Cat. She got us.

In this long-running dialogue, we discuss world events, the small triumphs of the day, little aches and pains, the cresting and ebbing of the Toronto Maple Leafs, our childrens' escapades... you know, the beauty and joy that is life. That portion of the conversation is a solid 2%. The remaining 98% is about beer. Good beer, bad beer, outstanding beer, somewhere-in-the-middle beer... all beer.

This innocuous French beer sets off huge
alarms within the Four Musketeers HQ...

To that end, if you wanna be a Musketeer, you have to be game for tomfoolery, dissing and general mockery. To wit, if the Musketeers know I am out with, say, my craft-loving co-worker Saga, I am quite safe. Saga and I will always find something unique in a Sea of Mainstream. But if I'm out with co-worker Gordo, who's a little more Joe Lunch-Pail in his beer choices, I'm gonna get drilled. One night in response to a Cat text asking what I was up to, I replied that I was out having post-work brews with Gordo. Instantly, her text came back: "OMG... WHAT are you drinking????" Well, that night as circumstances had it, we were at the Bronte Sports Kitchen on Tuesday Tall-Boy Night and while Gordo was happily quaffing away on his beloved Molson Canadian, I was trying out a Kronenbourg 1664, a French beer I had never had before. That instantly set off the Defcon-5 Intruder Alert alarms at Beer Musketeer headquarters. The next text, within seconds, came from Stevil - yes, a text from Wellington, New Zealand to Oakville, Ontario, Canada within seconds - with the plaintive message: "Kronenbourg? Good gawd, man. Why????"

I like the logic of this thinking. Also the
irony that it is on a Coors Light ad-board

This is why I'll never have to worry about being seated in a chair in the middle of the room, facing an intervention from the other Beer Musketeers. It would be more like an Anti-Intervention. "Don, we actually want you to drink more beer... but at the same time, be a little more specific and careful in your choices." My family might opt for a proper intervention but they're the reason I drink so I don't think that'll fly. (Note to any family member reading this: "No, not you. You're great... the other ones.") So how was that Kronenbourg 1664? Uhhh... it wasn't bad. Tasted like a slightly-better Euro-version of a mainstream North American lager. Liked it but I'm not gonna fly to France to give them any medals for it.

To that end, Saga and I have a theory on the big-name European imports, meaning Heineken, Stella Artois, Grolsch, Beck's - the big Euro-guns. When young Saga was in France a few years back, he had a Kronenbourg on tap. "It was delicious," he noted. "I thought when I got back to Canada, I had my new beer." So eventually, he returned, grabbed some Kronenbourg from the Beer Store. Upon his first sip at home, he looked at it and thought, "WTF is this?" We both believe that they alter their formulas for the beers being exported to North America to make them more palatable to the mainstream beer drinkers. To put this into beer terminology: they 'Budweiser' it. My high school buddy, Roy, currently residing in Nyon, Switzerland would probably agree as he once told me after a trip to the Guinness brewery in Dublin that the cans of Guinness we get here will never compare to the heavenly brown Exilir of the Gods he had right from the brewer's taps at St. James's Gates.

Czech lager Kozel - sayyy, now we're talking euro-tasty!!!

So the trick is to seek out less mainstream Euro-fare not as likely to alter anything, such as Czech lager, Kozel. Had one for the first time a couple weeks back and that's a tasty brew. The strongly-malted scent, slightly bitter taste is tweaked on the palate by what I'm gonna guess are Saaz hops. It says "lager" on the can but coming from Plsen region as it does, it's a pilsner. (RateBeer only gave this 40 but is notoriously hard on lagers and pilsners, obviously not popular choices on the website, so I tend to disregard pretty much all their scores for those two styles.)

Another nice Euro-find was Germany's Kostritzer Schwarzbier, a black lager whose aroma is nutty but bitter and chocolate on the tongue. I love a good dark/black lager and this certainly qualifies. A solid 82 on RateBeer so clearly we agree on dark lagers and schwarzbiers.

I will always have a couple of these in the
fridge at Donny's Bar and Grill these days.

Another beer that had languished in the fridge for a while at Donny's Bar and Grill was Britain's Young's Double Chocolate Stout, a Christmas gift given to me by Sandi From Upstairs. (From Upstairs is not her real last name.) She got me one of these and a Rogue Dead Guy Ale. I got her, uh, something for sure next Christmas. I don't even think the Dead Guy, one of my all-time favourites, made it down the staircase. Sandi didn't know I loved it - she just thought the label was cool. But this Young's Double Chocolate Stout - holy crap, that's a great stout. Brewed with both chocolate malt and actual dark chocolate, it smells of... wait, do I even have to say? I urged Musketeer Cat to try one and she, too, raved. This bad boy is the bomb. At $3.50 for a 500ml bottle, there's always a couple in my fridge door these days. If I feel like a stout, *bam*, there it is. So the trick with Euro-beers? Go past the big names and find the hidden gems.

The 2014 Ontario Brewing Awards were held at Toronto's Gladstone Hotel on April 3 and some of my favourite beers that I've talked about here took home medals, among them Cameron's Rye Pale Ale, Hop City's Barking Squirrel Amber Lager, F&M Stonehammer's Oatmeal Coffee Stout, Mill Street Belgian Wit and Muskoka's Winter Beard Double Chocolate Cranberry Stout.

Don't tell the Beer Musketeers but
I really enjoyed the Laker Red 5.5

One that caught me by surprise was Laker Light taking gold in the Light Beer category. Not because Brick Brewing is a larger brewery - after all, Molson's Rickards Blonde took silver in the Pilsner group and you don't get bigger than Molson. Also, that news that will make Saga very happy because he loves him some Rickard's Blonde... oh yeah. But no, it's actually because Laker Light is a discount beer and that caught me a little off-guard. That said, well done, Brick!! You see, this is why I'm a Beer Geek and not a Beer Snob. I really don't care who makes a good beer... so long as it is a good beer. As well, I'm not on a quest to try certain select beers - I'm on a quest to try ALL beers. Also it wasn't all that long ago, just last June, that I was the dude drinking discount beers. So it would be like those annoying people who quit smoking and then get all holier-than-thou on the still-smoking within the month. Now the fact is I've never had a Laker Light and likely never will. But the reason for that is simply that I have no interest in light beers - anyone's light beer, commercial or craft. (So, okay, not all beers. But most.) That said, I'll happily scout around on anyone's turf. When we got Laker Red 5.5 in single 473-ml cans, I thought I'd give it a go. It's a red ale and I love red ales - except this is classified as an amber lager but hey, if it walks like a duck and talks like a duck... It's all apple on the nose, apple on the tongue and at 5.5%, more bang for your buck if you like the discount lines. Discount Beer Drinkers (who in all probability have never read this blog), THIS is your hidden gem. Is it on the same level as the Flying Monkeys/Central City Collaborative Red-on-Red Ale, which is unbelievable? Of course not. But it has its quirky and quite tasty charms. I genuinely like it and have had it many times since. (Among others, of course. Like I said, I cast my net far and wide...)

Courtesy of my friend, Gail, here's a
urinal at Pizza Boy Brewing Brew Pub
in Enola, Pennsylvania. Their credo?
"You only rent the beer and then it
goes back into the keg." Holy crap!
That's the Circle of Beer legend!

Okay, like many, I'm concerned with the "dumbing down" of society, particularly with the advent of social media such as Facebook and Twitter and the proliferation of blogs just like this. To that end, I will contribute to Word Power by incorporating more complex words into my vernacular. Today, at some point, I'll try to work in power words like "proliferation", "incorporating" and "vernacular" into this blog. Okay, so here we... oh... damn. Never mind. Probably a bad idea, anyway...

Shout outs!!! Thanks to my friend Gail for the uber-cool Pizza Boy Brewing keg urinal to the left there. Great find! Thanks to my former Beer Store bro Tommy Salami for sending me the winners of the 2014 Ontario Brewing Awards on my Facebook wall with the simple note: "It looks like I have a shopping list for the LCBO this evening." Like him, there's a handful of winners on that list I still have to try! So here they are! Winners Of The 2014 Ontario Brewing Awards Of course, Beer Musketeers Stevil and Cat for both their unabashed mockery of Kronenbourg 1664 and uncanny ability to steer all conservations back to beer. Very much the same with that oddball Saga guy. And Musketeer Glenn? Man, we can't shut this guy up! He's back from his Florida visit with his lad, Jake, but it sounds like Daytona Beach just may have kicked serious ass in this one we'll innocently call: Daytona Beach Kicked Serious Ass and then another that chronicles the last day of the trip that we'll call: All Good Things Must Come To An End

Next up: an in-depth look at the Sleeman Empire. What Canadian brewery sold boot-leg beer? Maybe even to Al Capone himself? Not sure. We'll know soon. Okay, guys and dolls, that's it, that's all and I am outta here!!! Until next time, I remain...