When a giant buys a craft brewery

When Stevil St Evil landed at Donny's Bar and
Grill for a three-day bender Sophisticated Beer
Sampling at the beginning of June, we began
the transition from coffee to beer with Mill
Street Coffee Porter every day. Did it fool our
livers? Perhaps momentarily but not for long

So there I was on Friday, writing a blog about my Nickel Brook buddy, Tony Cox, who had taken me on a Tony Cox-guided tour of the Arts and Science Brewery in Hamilton when suddenly I got a text... from Tony Cox.

"Labatt just bought Mill Street," the text read. My response was immediate. "You are shitting me!" Nope, he texted, "John (Romano, owner of Nickel Brook Brewing) just told me." Quickly, I went online and yes, several media outlets were reporting the sale.

The response on Twitter and in the comments section of numerous online stories was, as can be expected, overwhelmingly negative with comments along the lines of "I have just drank my last Mill Street product" and countless references to "selling out." The more scathing, vitriolic comments amused me as always - it's interesting how insanely brave and viciously nasty some people are when they are hiding behind such online names as Bob-123. But man, they are funny in their outrage. I suspect that's not the writers' intent but hey, we get our laughs where we can, right?

Now before I continue, I have two big disclaimers to make here. Number one, I am a Beer Store employee and as such, Labatt shells out 49% of my weekly pay-cheque. And number two, before I started this blog in June 2013, immersing fully myself into the wonderful world of craft beers (well, all beers really), I had been a dedicated Labatt Blue drinker for decades. I'm not ashamed of that in the least because hey, you can't change the past.

When Labatt and Mill Street made the big announcement on Friday, the
boys were front and centre. From left, Mill Street CEO Irvine Weitzman,
Labatt President Jan Craps, Mill Street Brewmaster Joel Manning and
Mill Street co-founder Steve Abrams.  So what changes at Mill Street?

Indeed, in all honestly, there was huge pieces of my past that are hazy at best due to Blue. As the Germans are wont to say, "C'est la vie!" (No? Wrong people? Dammit, Jim, I'm a beer drinker, not a U.N. translator!) Now given these disclaimers, my first thought was, "Is Labatt trying to recoup some of my lost pay-cheque, previously spent on Blue by buying up a craft brewer I have been known to frequent on occasion?" Let's not rule that out as a possibility, people. But for the sake of quasi-accuracy, let's put that way, way down Labatt's Purchase Requirement List somewhere near the bottom.

I guess, yes, I can pour a Labatt Blue in this Mill
Street Brewing glass now and that is exactly what's
in there. The bottle on the left, however, is from the
early-1990s when Labatt put Blue into funky painted
label bottles and called it Pilsener, its original name.
So did I drink that Blue? Damn straight. Cost me $2.

So as I do work (depending on your definition of "work") for the Beer Store, you are welcome to take everything I say here with a grain of salt. Indeed, take it with all of Colonel Sanders "11 secret herbs and spices" for that matter. I write these as an off-hours Beer Geek, nothing more. And frankly, it's usually under the influence of some excellent (and sometimes less so) craft beers. But I also have some decades of journalism under my belt as both a reporter and editor. As such, I am fluent in Corporate Speak, having been piled under literally thousands of PR-heavy corporate releases back in the days, paper that would have been better and more accurately used in a washroom. So that's what I'm using today - those dubious skills - as I pour through what all the parties in this Mill Street/Labatt transaction had to say.

(Quick aside, political press releases were even worse than corporate ones. One time, I was on the phone with a political party treasurer and asked him about the party's deficit as outlined in a release. He stopped me cold. "We don't call it that," he stated flatly. Okay then, I asked, what do you call it? Hand to heart, he replied, "We call it a negative-surplus." There was a 40-second pause while I covered my phone to regain my composure as I had a giggle fit.)

There has been perhaps no greater comedic portrayal
of a PR flack than Aaron Eckhart's turn as a lobbyist
for the giant tobacco industry in the hilarious movie,
Thank You For Smoking. If you haven't seen this
movie, do so. It's one of the funniest flicks ever...

So let's see what the main players had to say during Friday's big announcement and then I'll translate it for us all into Regular-Speak with tongue planted firmly in cheek.

First on deck is Labatt President Jan Craps who said, "Our partnership and investment will accelerate its growth in one of the most dynamic beer segments..." Translation: "Mainstream beer growth is stagnant. Craft beer growth is growing. We want some of that tasty pie." He continued, "...while fully preserving Mill Street's creative character and pioneering spirit." Translation: "If we could make beer like this, we would. We can't so the next best thing is buying someone who can. We may just let them do their thing so long as, well, we keep eating pie."

Next up is Mill Street CEO Irvine Weitzman who said, "Our partnership with Labatt is a natural evolution in our growth..." Translation: "You should have seen the Brinks trucks backed on my front yard this morning. It was sick." He continued, "... that will allow more Canadians to enjoy our beer and secure the legacy of our brands..." Translation: "I am so stinkin' rich right now." And finally, ".. by allowing us to remain focused on the authentic characteristics that have made Mill Street what it is today."

Is it just me or does this product look a lot
better in that glass than the Blue did? This
is actually a very strong IPA from Mill
Street Brewing, which is quite new for me.
They take their Tankhouse Ale and then
dry-hop the hell out of it. The result? Some
breadiness and citrus on the nose, some
caramel on the tongue. The Cascade and
Nugget hops really give this 7.5%, 80 IBU
(international bitterness units) beer some
real pop. This is definitely one of their best
from an outfit not known for their IPAs...

Translation: "Have you ever heard of the Hawaiian island called Molokai? It's called Irvine Island now. Just bought it, bitches."

And finally, there's Mill Street's innovative and acclaimed Brewmaster Joel Manning, who gained huge with Labatt's $10 million investment into brewery improvements. "This investment in a state-of-the-art brewhouse that Mill Street will run on a stand-alone basis positions us to reach the very top of our craft." Translation: "I asked for a Ferrari. Seriously, is that so hard? I mean, a $10 million new brewing play-toy doesn't suck so I don't want to get all First World Problems here. But I'd be the only brewmaster with one. I could drive it to our Secret Craft Brewmaster Meetings and be all, check out my sweet ride, peasants!"

So back to reality, what does this purchase announcement mean? At its very core, it means exactly this - Mill Street just piggybacked onto a damn sweet distribution system, one that will now take them across the country and especially into the tough-to-crack Quebec market. Just last blog, I mentioned how Labatt bought up Lakeport only to shut them down a couple of years later. I don't see that happening here. Why? Lakeport brewed discount beer. Labatt could shut them down because they can easily do that in-house, too. I honestly don't believe that Labatt can brew Mill Street beers so why not just own them and let them do that, much like Molson's did quite some time ago with Creemore Springs?

This may just be the best lager I have ever had.
Why? It has tons of flavour, especially for a
lager. Regardless of who claims ownership to
it, I will continue to buy this tasty beverage.

Now for the Bob-123's out there who claim that Creemore Springs is now simply a Molson's product, chock full of preservatives that now enables them to travel coast-to-coast (I have read this more than a few times as there are many Bob-123s out there), I say simply this. You're wrong. Creemore Springs beers still have a shelf-life best measured in weeks, not months. That's certainly one criteria of a craft beer. If all of a sudden, Mill Street has a shelf-life equal to a human pregnancy, I will be the first to let you know.

While I don't personally feel it, I do, at least, understand the outrage from the craft beer purists, particularly those downtown Toronto types fiercely loyal to Mill Street. I have been listening to potential Mill Street sale rumours to either Labatt or Molson's for at least two years now. In fact, I was told by a big beer rep a few months ago that this had already happened quite some time ago and the two parties were just keeping it hush-hush. Negotiations? Probably. A done deal? Nah, not until Friday. In fact, perhaps Mill Street was playing the belle of the ball and entertaining offers from both sides as slick as a coy southern debutante. Who knows? Business transactions are seldom laid out for public consumption.

Are we now the biggest all natural organic brewery in
Canada? Oh yeah, think we are! Are we now claiming
bragging rights? Oh yeah, think we are. Hey, it's cold
here in a Canadian Winter! Throw us a frikkin' bone!

But I will leave the final word to Beau's All Natural Brewing in the tiny farming community of Vankleek Hill. Ontario. They have long waited for this day. Why? Allow me to explain. Every two weeks, we get a delivery from the Beer Store warehouse of just craft beers. (Some craft breweries do deliver directly to us.) While we will get three cases or less of other Mill Street products (as well as other craft products), we consistently get two full rows of Mill Street Organic Lager. That's 96 six-packs. It sells that well. According to our Mill Street rep, it outsells their other products combined on a three-to-one basis. The only product that comes close is Muskoka Brewing's Mad Tom IPA - we order six to nine cases - and that's solely because I work there. But back to Beau's, who produce nothing but organic beer. So now that the Organic Lager is officially owned by Labatt, it no longer qualifies any Mill Street product as craft.

By default, these Beau's All Natural Brewing Lug Tread
Lagered Ale eight-packs just became the largest-selling
organic craft beers at my Beer Store. Hey, it's tasty too!

By legal definition only, I mean, though certainly not by taste. It's still craft to me.

But after the news hit, Beau's quickly pumped out their own press release from Steve Beauchesne, brewery co-founder at Beau's. "We are happy to find out that we are now number one - although because all of our beer is certified organic, I would have guessed we already were. This news makes it official."
Translation: "We're number one! We're number one! What, bro? Come at me!"
"Like Mill Street, Beau's is also gearing up for increases sales on the heels of this announcement with the phone at the Vankleek Hill brewery ringing off the hook this morning with anxious new customers."
Translation: "We can afford a second and maybe even a third phone-line now!"
And Beauchesne ended it in the cheekiest possible way. "Interested Mill Street employees are welcome to send their resumes to: careers@beaus.ca."

Wellington Brewing in Guelph celebrated their 30th
anniversary a couple of weekends back. But how many of
their present day employees would remember this 4.5
litre beer-in-a-box they produced in 1987? Not many...

Translation: "Bazinga! MUAH HA HA HA HA!!!"

Now since it was announced at pretty much the same time, the purchase of SAB-Miller by Anheuser-Busch InBev down in the United States (still pending anti-trust review) for $104 billion makes our Labatt-Mill Street announcement kinda seem like small potatoes. SAB-Miller employees, feel free to crap your pants starting... *looks at watch* now. Mill Street employees, you can continue to work Depends-free unless you like the way they fill out your butt in pants. I suspect this is a hands-off purchase. Maybe yes, maybe no - we'll know soon. When it comes to business deals, I have no sense of proportion. That personality flaw might be a big deal. Or a small one. I'm not sure.

Next up is the sour beer challenge whereby I try yet again to see if I can acquire a taste for these beers. Not much success thus far. But guys and dolls, that's it, that's all and I am outta here. Until next time, I remain...