When All or Nothing bought Trafalgar

You just never who you could run into in the parking lot of Oakville's
Hopedale Mall. In my case, it was Eric and Jeff Dornan, the siblings
who own Oshawa's All or Nothing Brewhouse. The pair had just exited
the mall after signing the legal paperwork making them the new owners
of Trafalgar Ales and Meads last Tuesday. The deal was a real shocker.

Eric and Jeff pose with Mike and Nancy Arnold, the
now former owners of Trafalgar Ale and Meads. Mike
is basically a legend in the Canadian craft brewing
game, having started his brewery in August 1993 with
his wife and partner George Hengstman. Since that
time, Trafalgar has won countless awards, including
seven(!) alone at the 2015 Ontario Brewing Awards.

As chance meetings go, they don't come any flukier than this. Last Tuesday, I was on my break from the Beer Store located in Oakville's Hopedale Mall. (Well, actually, it is now technically called South Oakville Mall because a few years ago, Target moved and insisted the whole mall basically be refurbished to suit their needs. For the record, Target lasted a little more than a year. And to this day, no one calls the mall anything but Hopedale. Bite our collective arses, Target.)

But back to the story... I had forgotten my wallet on my desk at home so I had no cash, no debit card, nada.

I also had no driver's licence so thank gawd, I wasn't pulled over. I suppose I could have borrowed a few bucks until the next day but I am not a fan of borrowing money, even $5. Truth to tell, I wasn't even hungry. But I remembered I had some unchecked lottery tickets in my car so I figured, "Hey, maybe one is a $10 winner. You never know." (Yes, you do. No, it's not.) So off I went to the mall. No winners so I started wandering back to the store.

♫ The first time... ever I saw your face... ♫ Okay, that's a little
bit too sing-songy. But folks, this is Eric and Jeff Dornan at their
FIRST EVER beer festival - the inaugural 2014 Burlington
Summer Beer Festival. It was a very soggy Saturday when I met
the guys and enjoyed their All or Nothing Hopfenweisse wheat.

Suddenly I spotted a bright yellow Mini-Cooper adorned with the All or Nothing Brewhouse logo and their familiar cartoon boxer mascot, Cornelius, in his "Put up yer dukes" stance. So I stopped to get a picture of it on my phone. Suddenly, I heard a voice. "Don? Is that you?" It was Eric Dornan, walking towards the car with his brother Jeff. You see, I had met the brothers in July 2014 at the inaugural Burlington Summer Beer Festival down in Spencer Smith Park. They had just opened their Underdog's Brewhouse a week prior.
This was their first ever Beer Festival and the first exposure of their top-flight All or Nothing Hopfenweisse wheat ale to the beer drinking public. Using three malts and four hops, they had created a great German-style wheat with some west coast pale ale flare. Tasty brew.

Turns out I had stumbled upon the pair as they were leaving an office where they put their signatures on the papers that handed them full ownership of Oakville's Trafalgar Ales and Meads. The purchase was officially announced on June 20 and frankly, surprised the hell out of everybody. While Eric recognized me instantly, I could see it was taking Jeff a little longer to figure out where he knew me from. About 15 seconds later, it clicked. "Hey," he grinned, "Where's your Tilley?" He was referring to my Australian Outback Drinking Hat that I wear to every single beer festivals I attend because it's easier than, you know, actually taking the effort to comb my hair before I go out in public. I must be one helluva fun date. No wonder my phone is, like, never buzzing with offers.

Remember when these guys were called UnderDog's
Brewhouse? Yeah, these days they just go by All Or
Nothing Brewhouse and there's a legal reason for that. 

Also for the record, I'd like to point out my Outback Drinking Hat was purchased at a gift shop in a swanky five-star resort on Mexico's Mayan Riviera. That's about as far removed from true Australian culture as anything could be. The closest I came to seeing an alligator was probably some rich lady's purse. So it's something of an ironic drinking hat.

So onto the big purchase. I asked the guys how a pair of Oshawa brothers who contract-brew a solitary wheat ale ended up buying an established Oakville brewery. "Well, we knew (Trafalgar owner) Mike (Arnold) from any number of beer events," said Eric. "At some point, I guess he found out that we wanted to build a brewery, I don't think he had a retirement plan figured out yet so one day, he approached us and asked us if we'd be interested in Trafalgar."

The lure of setting up shop in an established, award-winning brewery was strong enough that the brothers worked quickly to get their financial ducks in a row and happily jumped on the offer. It may be the only time in provincial history that a contract brewer has bought out a brewery.

Some day, the brothers would love to relocate the entire brewery
to Oshawa's Colonel R.S. McLaughlin Armoury, a 102-year-old
military building that served as a training facility for years
through several wars. These days, it acts as a community centre
but as it's a federal heritage building, it could be a tough sell
for the guys to set up shop here. That said, a month ago, the pair
were contract brewers. Now they own a brewery. So who knows?
Also it would be pretty cool to be the only brewery with a damn
Sherman Tank out front. Even Molson's doesn't have a tank...

(Quick aside: Does it seem a little weird to anyone else that at some point, some dude must have lined up a whole bunch of ducks in a row, took a step back, looked at them and declared, "Okay, now I'm ready to proceed...")

Noting they'd come a long way in a short time from contract brewing at Railway City in St. Thomas to being Oakville brewery owners, Jeff offered up a quick correction. "You're right," he noted, "we did start at Railway City. That's where we were when we first met but for the last while, we've been brewed out of (Etobicoke's) Cool Brewing."

Their first order of business, it would seem, is setting up a state-of-the-art canning line at Trafalgar, whose entire line has always been bottled. In its two-year existence, All or Nothing has been sold exactly two ways - in cans and kegs. If you've followed the guys on Facebook or Twitter from the beginning like I have, it seemed like every week, another pub or restaurant was adding their wheat ale to their taps. Beyond the new canning line, they have plans of adding additional fermentation tanks to meet the brewery's now-growing needs.

Cornelius, as well as the Dornan brothers, was an
active presence at this past Summer's Toronto
Craft Beer Cruise. These guys are everywhere...

For starters, the brewery just added a new nicely-hopped German-style wheat to their portfolio. But the thing is, a couple of years back, Trafalgar also became an artisanal distillery. Beyond beer and meads, they added cider and liquor to the mix. So in essence, All or Nothing went from making a single wheat ale to making... well, everything.

On top of that, Trafalgar also brews all the beers shipped to the LCBO for sister company, Black Creek Historic Brewery. So the Dornans now own a little piece of Toronto heritage, none of it connected to the late Rob Ford. (You never want that as part of the deal.)

But something else occurred to me afterwards. Yes, these two guys just bought Trafalgar - that much should be pretty clear unless you skipped every sentence before this one. But back in the Spring, Mike Arnold was the owner of one of 20 craft breweries across Ontario that bought their way onto the Beer Store's Board of Directors. Now Jeff and Eric own Trafalgar and that means... holy crap, these guys are now my bosses!!! And now it dawns on me that had I actually been hungry, I could have asked these guys for an advance on my cheque. It's important that bosses are responsive to employees' needs. Especially mine.

The All or Nothing fighting pose is now
becoming as iconic as the Don Cherry-
Ron McLean thumbs up. Here, Eric and
customer Barry Naymark put up their
dukes on the Toronto Craft Beer Cruise.

So with the addition work space of Trafalgar, what's next for the brothers? Expanding their line of wheats primarily. From the start - and I mean back in July 2014 - the brothers emphasized to me that they wanted to be Ontario's best source of wheat beers year-round. With over 400 restaurants, bars, LCBOs and Beer Stores carrying All or Nothing, they're off to a strong start, especially for a style that is considered a Summer beer.

But when I noticed their licence plate, UNDRDOG9, I had to ask why they gave up the Underdog name back in December. Well, it turns our that another small Ontario craft brewer had used the name Underdog on a pale ale. "It's wasn't under trademark or anything," noted Eric. "I mean, we researched the name long before naming our brewery." But suddenly, they found themselves holding a cease-and-desist order from that other brewery. "I don't even think their beer (which they hadn't heard of until the lawsuit) had sold 5,000 units so it was pretty surprising." Rather than hand lawyers filthy-large piles of cash in a fight over who was the true "underdog", the brothers just renamed the brewery after their flagship beer.

And now that they own a brewery in Oakville in which they are about to make a significant investment, do they stay in Oakville or move the whole shooting match back to Oshawa? That's a prospect that has Beer Bro Glenn salivating. Well, that's still up in the air.

An impressive combined line-up of All or Nothing and
Trafalgar Ale and Meads products. One prediction for this
business venture? More wheats being brewed in Oakville.

Jeff told Oshawa website SlowCity.ca last month that they "just resigned our lease for another two years so we are not planning to uproot and move operations any time soon. The Durham region has been very good to us over the last couple years and we want to continue to work and live in the community." So the administrative end of All or Nothing is clearly staying put although in the same interview, Jeff made it clear they planned on making good use of Trafalgar's retail shop.

A separate story in the Oshawa Express saw the brothers still eager to set up a brewery in Oshawa, ideally in the Colonel R.S. McLaughlin Armoury, a much-beloved 102-year-old former military structure on Simcoe Street that now mostly serves as a community centre.

A Doge review of All or Nothing Hopfenweisse wheat ale.

However, the fact that it is designated as a federal heritage building means I might have an easier time opening Playboy Mansion as a craft beer bar. Let's not forget that even if they find a suitable Oshawa location, it doesn't preclude the brothers simply owning one brewery in Oakville and another in Oshawa. That's what John Romano has set up these days, owning Nickel Brook in Burlington and having half-ownership of the Arts and Sciences Brewery in Hamilton, shared with Collective Arts Brewing. Hey, time will tell. A month ago, Jeff and Eric were contract brewers. Now look at these beer studs. So when Eric's parting words were, "You gotta come up to Trafalgar and visit us," you can bet your ass, I agreed. I mean, yeah, I'm surrounded by beer all day but why not do that off the clock, as well? Life's all about finding safe, comfortable things in new environments, right? But guys and dolls, that's it, that's all and I am outta here!! Until next time, I remain...

Muskoka Brewing - the best part of 1996

They said they'd be there for us but were they? I
mean, really? No, they disappeared 12 years ago
while Muskoka Brewery has been there, instead...

Back in 1996, times were a lot simpler.

The TV show, Friends, ruled the television airwaves. The show had finished its second season and would start its third in this year. Best Chandler line ever. Joey: "You didn't cry when Bambi's mom died?" Chandler: "Yes, it was so sad when the guy stopped drawing the deer."

The Spice Girls had just burst onto the music scene. I can't name one of their songs but I do know one married soccer star David Beckham. I can't remember her Spice name but 20 years later, let's just go with Old Spice.

Beanie Babies were a big fad. I don't really remember what they were other than little stuffed dolls. I wish I had paid more attention since they originally sold for something like $15-$20 and now run over $3,000 on eBay. Or in terms I understand more clearly, 60-plus cases of Mad Tom IPA.

The Nintendo 64 was just released and frankly, I can still kick anyone's ass at Super Mario 64. Well, if I can remember how to work the console because most things are not quite as simple as falling off a horse. Tumbling off an equine is probably somewhat similar.

I don't use the term "hero" lightly but Muskoka
Brewery founder Gary McMullen heard this tree was
about to fall over and since that day, he has held it up,
using just one shoulder. Actually, I suppose that makes
him more of a hero to arborists. Okay, I'll go with the
whole started-a-craft-brewery angle for my hero thing

And finally, Mad Cow Disease was declared in Great Britain. Basically it was about infected beef that could make you quite ill if consumed. I also suspect that at the big meeting to decide on a name for the disease, one Brit scientist, who'd had a nasty argument with his wife the night prior, stood up and said, "I have an idea..."

All of those things have come and gone (cows' moods have since been upgraded to somewhat irritated) but something big that started small in 1996 is still here - Muskoka Brewing in Bracebridge. Yup, it was back in June 1996 that Muskoka founders Gary McMullen and Kirk "Kirby" Evans first opened the brewery's doors.

Unfortunately, this story started with some sad news early on as Evans was in a car crash just two months in and six months later, succumbed to his injuries in the hospital. Talking to the Bracebridge Examiner this past April, it was clear McMullen still can't wrap his head around the tragedy. "I was young when it happened, 26, and I think Kirk was 25. You don't expect that stuff to happen. You were young and invincible." While he questioned himself on whether he should even continue, ultimately, he conceded, "It would have been easy and acceptable for people looking at the business to say, 'No wonder they cashed it in' but we kept going."

You missed Pride Week? Muskoka's Summer Survival
Pack has your rainbow of colours right here. For my
money, this is the best Mix-Six I have ever seen. You have
a lager, an ale, a kolsch, a wheat, a session IPA and one of
Canada's best IPAs in one pack. Tis a thing of brew beauty

Asked in the same interview how he thinks Kirby would have viewed the brewery's present-day success, McMullen was certain. "I think he would have been really proud. He'd have a big grin on his face, for sure."

Before getting into their beers and 20th anniversary celebrations, though, perhaps it's time to explain what Muskoka (the region) means to people from south-west Ontario. It is cottage country, plain and simple. A humongous 2,500-square-mile tract of land off Georgian Bay that has 1,600 lakes, making it one of Canada's premier cottaging areas. We went there in our youth to our buddies' parents' cottages. You weren't from this area unless you have partied hard at The Kee To Bala on numerous occasions. Many go there now as cottage owners (well, not me - people who were smart with their money) and it is still some of the most beautiful and scenic land ever put on this Earth. It is, in essence, where people from the Greater Toronto Area escape towards to get the hell out of the Greater Toronto Area. It is also home to three premiere Ontario craft brewers - Muskoka in Bracebridge, Sawdust City Brewing in Gravenhurst and Lake of Bays Brewing in Baysville. There's a whole lot of beautiful in that area.

The Ultimate Muskoka IPA Debate - Mad Tom vs Twice
As Mad Tom. At first, I leaned heavily towards Twice As
Mad. Most IPA lovers I know still do. But then I started
drinking Mad Tom for a while - that while being most of
2015. I love them both - now equally - as they are very
different tastes. Dry-hopped with Centennial and
Chinook hops, the 6.4%, 64 IBU Mad Tom has tons of
grapefruit on the nose with light fruit and a bit of pine
on the tongue. The Twice As Mad at 8.4% and 71 IBUs
is aggressively double dry-hopped with big citrus on the
nose and big whacks of pine on the tongue. The price
difference between the two six packs is just $1.35 so why
not try both, side-by-side and judge them for yourself?

Ironically, McMullen himself does not own a cottage. Then again, he owns a brewery in the middle of Muskoka cottage country so who the hell needs one? Throw a lawn chair on the grass and catch some rays because you're basically at a cottage that never ever runs out of beer. Tough to beat that. Besides, as the man himself said in a recent Q&A, "Muskoka is a state of mind. You can live in a condo on the Gardiner in Toronto, slide open your patio doors and two Muskoka chairs are there. Pan-fry some trout, toss a salad, pour a glass of Summerweiss and you're there."

Well, then, Gary has just explained why the most comfortable and relaxing place in the world for me and visiting friends is the patio at Donny's Bar and Grill. When the foliage fills in on the lilac bushes behind me, I am afforded complete privacy from the townhouses across the way. Square glass table, five chairs, uneven patio stones (that could easily be fixed but haven't been) and a little "man garden" that my son and I built with zero flowers, dollar store ornaments and exactly three hostas. I might add a fourth next Summer. I might level those patio stones. Who knows? Geographically, it may be in Burlington but to me, that patio is my Muskoka and I spend May to September living there.

As part of their 20th Anniversary celebrations,
the brewers at Muskoka took their flagship
beer, the Cream Ale, and oak-aged it. That
rendered this as a completely different beer,
adding woodiness to both aroma and flavour.

You may notice all my pictures of beer are always facing the brick wall on the east side of the patio? Why? Because that's where the sun faces from 1 pm to 4:30 pm on the patio. Boring backdrop, yes, but the sexiness of the beers in the pictures distract you from it. Also that wall is a support structure so it plays a larger role in my life. Nice to give it some face time. Who's a good wall? *No reaction* You are, boy. Yes, you are. But the part of Donny's Bar and Grill that literally (or more accurately put, figuratively) screams Muskoka? The clocks are always set at Beer O'Clock. And that means it's time to start talking Muskoka beers right here, right now...

Let's start with that Summer Survival Pack, seen above. Okay, four of those beers - the Craft Lager, Cream Ale, Detour and Mad Tom - have have descriptive praise heaped on them in this space in the past. The Mad Tom, so much so, that a high school buddy changed its name to Mad Don to honour my last birthday. (It's February 14th, Muskoka, in case you want to do a special run next year. No pressure. Take a can, wrap paper around it and write "Mad Don IPA" in crayon. Draw a stick-man with hockey hair. That'll do.) But the two I have never talked about - the Summerweiss and the Kirby's Kolsch - both just won silver at the 2016 Canadian Brewing Awards for Best German-Style Wheat and German-Style Kolsch.

For those outside Canada who are confused as to what a
Muskoka chair is, it's one of these bad boys usually found
on the deck on a Canadian cottage. Granted, most of them
aren't branded with the Muskoka Brewery logo on the arm

A few years back, Muskoka took their annual Summer brew, the Hefe-Weissbier, and gave it a total rebranding, taking a plain white can with blue borders and changing it to bright yellow can and renaming it Summerweiss. Why? Don't know. Dammit, Jim, I'm a beer geek, not a marketing nerd! But I do know this is a great example of a German wheat with banana on the nose, a slight hint of bubblegum (that fades instantly) on the tongue followed up with more banana and clove. Nothing screams "Summer!" louder than a strong German wheat on the patio. Except the time I sipped this and actually screamed "Summer!" I was several decibels louder than the can. The brewery also makes a dunkelweizen for the Winter months called Winterweiss, which marries all the best parts of a dark lager to a German wheat. Equally delicious except I am less a fan of the Winter months so the Summerweiss holds a, let's say, warmer place in my heart.

Every Spring, the brewery releases the Legendary Oddity
and every year, it's a slightly different tweak. This year, I
drank mine on May 6, the release date of Captain America:
Civil War. Cap looks pissed here. Why? He's mad at Iron
Man!!! Geez, do I have to explain the whole movie to you?

The Kirby Kolsch was just introduced this Summer to honour the late-Evans and lemme tell you this. Everyone I know who has brought the Summer Survivor Park has asked when the Kirby will be introduced in single cans, just as the other five already are. That's how much it's been enjoyed. (Good news - it's out in singles now!) While I believe peach puree was added into the brewing, you only get it faintly in the taste and you practically have to be thinking of it. But it's lightly citrus on the nose with some hop and malt on the tongue. Also a refreshing Summer beverage for the patio. The beer's honouree would be proud.

Every Spring, the brewery releases their Legendary Oddity and every year, it is quite different. I remember having it in a 650-ml (21 ounce) bomber a few years back and it had some cloying sweetness to it. Not this year. The 7.1% offering was spicy on the nose with more spice, Heather tips and orange on the tongue. It was a tasty little bugger. Went back for a few more for I, too, am an oddity.

This past winter, the brewery released a special
batch of their Winter Beard Double Chocolate
Cranberry Stout that had been aged in Tennessee
Whiskey Barrels for over a year. The result?
A 9% boozy, fruity and chocolatey explosion...

Had something very unique from these guys this past winter. They took their annual Winter Beard Double Chocolate Cranberry Stout from a few years back and aged it for a year in Tennessee Whiskey barrels. The result, which was very hard to find outside their Bracebridge retail shop, was Winter Jack, a distant relative of Mad Tom, I presume. As I had enjoyed Winter Beard for several years, this barrel aging added a whole new level to the game. It added a beautiful layer of bourbon to the aroma and taste of this 9% stout without stealing any of the chocolate. I remember feeling the warmness in my stomach as I had this at Rib Eye Jack's Ale House back in January. Outstanding!

Okay, before I sign off, a couple more things I like about one of my favourite brewers. On every bottle, they stamped quite clearly "Enjoy before" with the date. You can't miss it. Bright yellow letters. Could be orange as I'm colourblind. I probably should have just asked someone but that inevitably leads to the "So what colour is this?" game that colourblind people dislike intensely. So that lettering is yellow for the purpose of this column. (But maybe not.) That has helped me rescue a handful of Mad Toms and Twice as Mad Toms before their expiration date. And by rescue, I, of course, mean that poor beer was trapped in a bottle and I saved it from its glassy captivity. Not every hero wears a cape. Or in my case, underwear. Too much info? Sorry...

Well, yeah, sure, this sign will guide you into
the brewery but how do we know that it's not
one of those Hotel California deals where you
can never leave? Geez, that'd be pretty sweet

Another little thing I noticed about the brewery a while back was when I had a Mad Tom poured for me at Rib Eye Jack's about a year ago. All of the breweries on tap have their own glasses at the bar. So there I was innocently sipping on my Mad Tom when I noticed writing etched into the bottle of the pint glass. It was the company's motto: "Venture off the beaten path." I had enjoyed a pint of Mad Tom dozens (and dozens) of times at the bar in the past and never once noticed that writing on the bottom of the glass. Should they some day start handing out Nobel Peace Prize for Lack of Observation, frankly, I'm a lock. Although, let's face it, I probably won't notice I won anything.

And one last thing - and something the brewery should be proud of. On June 24, one day before their big 20th Anniversary Party at the brewery, they issued a media release declaring that they had become the first Ontario certified Living Wage employer and the first Canadian brewery to adopt a living wage for its employees. Unlike minimum wage, a "living wage" is based simply on the principle that full-time work at the brewery should provide financial security above the poverty line. All sorts of things are factored into living wage, mostly the cost of living, goods and services in the immediate region. In terms of being good bosses, these Muskoka guys have definitely ventured off the beaten path. Well done to one of my all-time favourite breweries. I wish I could be that giving. If the survival of a buddy depended on my willingness to share my Mad Tom, I would be weeping big hoppy tears at his graveside. Just sayin'. But guys and dolls, that's it, that's all and I am outta here! Until next time, I remain, as always...

When friends share beer...

When Drunk Polkaroo stopped into Donny's Bar and
Grill, he came bearing a gift - the Puzzler IPA from
his homebrew outfit, Enigma Brewing, with pal Glen,
a.k.a. BigCanuck1975. The brew boys were pleasantly
surprised when they cracked open the first beer from
the first batch they have made. "It looks like beer,"
said Polkaroo in the video. "I think we have beer!"

There was a big entrance coupled with a big exit on Thursday, June 23.

The exit was interesting as the United Kingdom voted to leave the European Union, which is, in essence, an economic body encouraging trade between 28 member countries. As I have now read all about the social, economic and political ramifications of the Brexit vote, I'm getting the sense that it was not a smooth move. However - and this part's important, people - this is how democracy works. The masses vote, the results are tallied and then the will of the majority over-rules the will of the minority. What I think about it all from across the ocean means diddly-squat. And if I'm being completely honest, while I, like most North Americans, am familiar in all things Hillary, Bernie and The Donald, I had only heard about Brexit in mid-June - maybe a week prior to the big vote. Had you asked me even at the beginning of that month, I would have guessed it was some sort of snack cracker. Or perhaps that Brexit was related to Hodor on Game of Thrones. There's so many characters on that show that I probably would have outright lied and mumbled, "Oh... right! I remember him now."

So I guess if Brexit was a self-help book for countries, it'd be entitled "He's Just Not Into EU." But Britain, you of all countries should know, if you want to leave, do it properly by dumping a crap-load of tea into a harbour.

This editorial cartoon naturally gave me a chuckle as it
invokes the Monty Python skit "Ministry of Silly Walks"

But again, in complete honesty, while I saw the hashtag #Brexit popping up, I had no idea what it meant. When I figured it out (Britain exits - duh) I thought it was kinda clever. So if other European countries want out of the EU, I hope they come to me for their hashtags. Austria, you get #Outstria. Italy, how do you feel about #Italeaving. Finland, I have #Finished for you. Portugal, a couple up for grabs - #Departugal or #Portugone - so pick your favourite. Czech Republic, you were so easy - #CzechOut. Unfortunately, Romania, it looks like you're stuck in the EU as the best I could do for you was #Remainia. I'll keep trying. (Until I forget in less than 10 seconds.)

Drunk Polkaroo's Beer Fridge after a trip into Toronto
with pal Brett was full to overflowing. He scored that
Muskoka's 20 Anniversary Oak-Aged Cream Ale from
me (top centre) but from everyone else? Aye carumba!

Now, frankly, the big entrance on that day was of far greater interest to me as beer writing buddy, Drunk Polkaroo (a.k.a Robert) and his pal, Brett (a.k.a. The Wobbly Moose) landed on the patio of Donny's Bar and Grill as a brief stop on their way into Toronto. After being greeted warmly by both myself and my son, David (a.k.a. Huggy Kid), I was presented with a special gift - a one-litre (34 ounce) plastic bottle of his The Puzzler IPA, the first beer to come out of his Enigma homebrewing outfit with buddy Glen (a.k.a. Big Canuck 1975). The guys were shooting for an Octopus Wants To Fight or Ransack The Universe style IPA. Aiming for an 8.7% ABV, they measured it later and erroneously thought it was about 4.7%. That's okay, Glen said in their video (I'll link to it at the end), "we made a session IPA." Uh, no. After drinking it, they quickly realized it was close to 8%. And when I had it later that day, I realized it was something else. Namely, it was delicious. A healthy citrus aroma, nice orange rind on the tongue, by thunderin' Jaysus, these guys made an honest-to-goodness sure-as-shootin' first-rate IPA.

After coworker Marie hooked me up with a Danger
Zone Imperial Farmhouse IPA, Drunk Polkaroo
matched that with a 1-Up Double IPA. Marie had
also given me a 1-Up a couple of years back but it
was fun having these side-by-side. Two different
styles of Imperial IPAs as the Danger Zone really
amped up the spiciness in that true Belgian way. 

Gonna say between 70 and 80 IBUs (international bitterness units) and the lacing on my glass? Top to bottom! Beautifully carbonated. Praising it on Instagram, it caught the eye of coworker Jay-Dawg, who asked, "Was it really that good or were you being really nice to a friend?" No, I told him, it was that good. "Huh," he noted, "Maybe we should be homebrewing?"

Now oddly, that day, while #Brexit trended hugely on Facebook and Twitter, Polkaroo and my historic meeting did not. I suspect it was because we didn't have a flashy hashtag. Hmm, perhaps if we went with #TheseTwoNeverShutUp or #WeGetItYouGuysLoveCraftBeer we would have definitely trended in the, uhhh, double digits. Maybe even trending as high as 17 retweets and 24 likes. Seriously, it's all in the hashtag!

But while I forgot to give Polkaroo some great Detroit beer glasses I had set aside for him, I did have a Muskoka 20th Anniversary Oak-Aged Cream Ale for him. Haven't had it yet, neither has he. We'll let you know soon. But Polkaroo had one more in his arsenal for me - that being the world's biggest cooler that fits into a Mazda trunk. A Block 3 Danger Zone Imperial Farmhouse IPA.

New Zealand buddy and Beer Bro Stevil St Evil has been
so impressed with some of the beers given to me recently
by Rib Eye Jack's Ale House GM Steve that he created a
little graphic after noting that I always call it Steve's Stash

But as it turned out, my co-worker Marie had just given me one a day or two prior so he quickly switched it up and gave me their 1-Up Double IPA, instead. Now Marie had also given one of those a couple of Summers back but now I could try them side-by-side. Which is exactly what I did (although if you've read this before, me explaining my beer drinking habits is more pointless than a Safe Sex Guide in the hands of a Kardashian.)

As both Beer Bro Stevil St Evil are huge fans of the raunchy TV show, Archer, I loved the label of Danger Zone which borrows heavily from the cartoon's opening credits. Well, what can I say, Block 3 from the tiny hamlet of St. Jacobs continue to impress! Danger Zone is an Imperial IPA with a Belgian touch but not too much of one, meaning some nice spice on the nose with more on the tongue but also pine and some citrus in the herb-like bitterness.

Did someone mention Steve's Stash? Well, these two beers
from Innocente Brewing in Waterloo are the latest to fall
victim to my back patio. As different as night and day...

At 9% and 70 IBUs (international bitterness units), it was a nice step up from many Belgian-style IPAs. But their 1-Up Double IPA, baby, that's all west coast happening in that bottle. Using Magnum, Summit, Crystal, Citra and Cascade hops, this 8.7%, (roughly) 85 IBU smokeshow is orange rind on the nose with citrus and lovely maltiness on the tongue. Two great offerings from a tiny brewery that will continue to rise in the craft industry.

Rib Eye Jack's Ale House General Manager Steve is always generous with new finds so let's look at a couple from Innocente Brewing (Waterloo) in a little segment I like to call Steve's Stash. (Halton Police, this stash is not drug-related but if there are concerns, I'll give you his address.) First on deck was their Two Night Stand Imperial IPA which took gold at the Canadian Brewing Award, even surpassing my all-time favourite Canadian Imperial IPA, Nickel Brook's Immodest, which collected bronze.

When I teased Sassy Cassy over the simplicity of Sleeping
Giant's Bay Street Brown Ale label, she said that if they
ship their beers out to the LCBOs or Beer Store, they put
proper labels on them. For the ones sold at the brewery?
Quick stickers and hanging name tags. Hey, it works...

Okay, Two Night Stand is insanely fruity on the nose so small wonder you get healthy dollops of juicy mango plus pine and malt on the tongue. At 8.5% and 100+ IBUs, this was a very limited run so you'll have to wait patiently for the next run. Do so. It's that good.

Now their Giant's Causeway Wee Heavy caused me a wee heavy bit of trepidation. That's, of course, a $10 word that many translate to fear but since I fear no beer, let's go with apprehension. The reason was simply that it is a blend of their red-wine barrel-aged Scotch Ale and their Irish Red Ale. Why the concern? Not a fan of red wine. At all. So how was it? Much to my surprise, I loved what the wine barrel influence added to this 7.7%, 31 IBU deep dark beer. It added some deep plum on the nose and gave it both woodiness and nuttiness on the tongue. A beer that a wine lover would enjoy. And apparently me. Well, I am half Scottish and half Irish so this blend pretty much had the Redmond name all over it. Two very different but equally outstanding beers.

Well, this would be one I shared with Beer Bro
Glenn. The Greetings From Canada Coast to
Coaster Imperial ESB, a collaboration beer
made by Garrison, Trou Du Diable, Flying
Monkeys and Phillips Brewing. Tasty stuff!!

One of my biggest pleasures of the Summer is when Sassy Cassy returns home from her stint at Thunder Bay's Lakehead University. For starters, she's a much-beloved Beer Store daughter. But she must do well at school because she's smart enough to always bring me some beers from Sleeping Giant Brewing. That's both book-smart and street-smart... as her sweet gesture benefits me!! She brought me their 2016 Ontario Brewing Awards gold medalist Beaver Duck American Pale Ale, which I had much earlier this year and raved about in this spot. But she also had their Bay Street Brown Ale for me. Now I am not the biggest brown ale fan. The style has been around for so long, I feel like I should reloading my musket between sips. But I quite liked the Bay Street. The 5.2% reddish-brown ale had some nice dark fruits on the nose with nips of caramel and a nice maltiness on the tongue. Did I like it better than Beaver Duck APA? Hell to the no! But for a brown ale, it impressed me more than most. Good job, boys!

Here's one that I shared with Beer Bro Glenn during a recent stop at Donny's Bar and Grill - The Greetings From Canada Coast to Coaster Imperial English Special Bitter.

This is my little Sassy Cassy winning the
Outstanding Residence Council Member
Award for 2016 at Lakehead University.
That means she was chosen as the person
who helped those in residence get the best
of their experience. And yes, she's very,
very pretty but back off, guys! She has a
boyfriend and a father and a Beer Store
Father and we will beat the tar out of you!

Dug out from the back of my fridge, we shared this collaborative brew made by (moving east to west) Garrison Brewing in Halifax, Microbrasserie La Trou du Diable in Shawinigan, Quebec, Flying Monkeys from Barrie and Phillips Brewing in Victoria, BC. So truly, coast to coast and how appropriate that I'm sharing this one on July 1st, Canada Day. (Total fluke but...) Okay, kids, this ain't your Daddy's or Grandpappy's ESB, I tell you that. At 7.6% and 50 IBUs (way high), you get a lot of malt but also citrus on the nose and some real burnt bitterness and caramel on the tongue. Almost like those British-west coast hybrid IPAs, this thing is goosed to the gills. This is like no ESB you've ever had - a big taste for a big country from four of our premier craft brewers. It's so Canadian, you'll say "sorry" after the first sip.

Okay, some sidenotes to all the stories told today. As I mentioned, I'm half Irish-half Scottish. I suspect my relatives still there would like a word or two with the Brexit voters. I also mentioned the Danger Zone was Belgian style. Belgium, your EU exit hashtag is #Byegium. Also when Drunk Polkaroo was getting me my bottle of The Puzzler IPA, I noticed one had 7 written on the cap. "Oooh, Lucky 7," I said. He was pulling out #4 but asked if I wanted to switch. "Nope, number 4, Bobby Orr, I'll take that." You have to be either Canadian or from Boston to get that.

And finally, Halton Police, when I threw Rib Eye Steve under the bus, I need to know one thing. Crime Stoppers still comes with a cash reward, right? Because snitches get stitches and I want some craft beer during my recovery time. Well, gotta go. Hope all is going according to plan. Well, if my plan was "Drink beer now, figure out life later," then yes, everything is going according to plan. I'm not suggesting it's a one-sided relationship... but I wonder if craft beer thinks of me all day? Oh yes and that Drunk Polkaroo The Puzzler Video? It's right here. Click on: Puzzle Me This, Batman! But guys and dolls, that's it, that's all and I am outta here! Until next time, I remain as always...

Remembering George

Naturally, at the memorial, a picture of George had a glass of
his beloved Coors Light and a shot of Goldschlager liqueur,
that sparkly-ass shot he used to down with his beer. Of course,
I couldn't let that stand, sliding my Muskoka Mad Tom IPA
into the tribute held at Rib Eye Jack's Ale House on June 8.

All I know is that I better get this one right or Tiffers will crush me like a bug.

And who might Tiffers be? Well, she would be Tiffany, one of the servers at Rib Eye Jack's Ale House in Burlington. She is also their social media maven so whenever something I write is liked or retweeted, well, that's Tiffer's handiwork. And could she crush me like a bug? Well, she's about my height but incredibly buff and toned. If I met her at a party and had to guess what her profession was, I would likely guess she was a Cross-Fit trainer or Yoga instructor. So yeah, I'd be Dead Man Walking, no doubt.

So while I could go on at length about Tiffers, perhaps mentioning that in a past life, the striking redhead (well, this week anyway - the hair colour, I mean - she will still be striking next week) was head of communications for a nation-wide hotel chain or that like me, she graduated from a Journalism program, this is not about Tiffers.

No, this is about a Rib Eye Jack's regular named George. (Tiffers, who's this crazy manic ball of energy who routinely wins the Waitress Fit-Bit Challenges and may just be a force of Nature, will continue to pop up throughout this.)

George's children, Adam and Jessica, pose beside
a collage of pictures of their father. Looking at it,
I saw many sides of George that I'd never seen
before. George with hair. George without a beard.
George with both legs. And High School George.

Though George was a regular at Rib Eye Jack's, he always referred to Drafted Sports Bar in Oakville as his "home bar" because his home is, in fact, there. If that's the case, from personal observation, George spent a lot of time away from home because I was just as likely to see him at Rib Eye Jack's as not. In fact, George was well-off enough financially to have a permanent and modified room on the first floor of the Comfort Inn around the corner on the South Service Road in Burlington. And it was modified for a reason. Due to a serious infection years back, George only had one leg. So the hotel basically re-did a room to accommodate his physical needs. It was also the hotel staff who found George collapsed on the floor in his room late-May after he suffered a stroke. Tiffers was a near-daily visitor while George convalesced in the hospital but shortly afterwards, he suffered a second stroke and on June 2, George Amisimowicz closed his eyes for the final time and was no longer with us.

While all the staff at Rib Eye Jacks, as well as Drafted, were incredibly sad at the loss, Tiffers... well, she was gutted. The pair were tight. Because Tiffers is a little older than the other girls there (but still in her 30s), she could banter with George in a far more, well, let's say, risque manner. And George loved it. So as Mr Miyagi might say, it's time to "wax on" eloquently about the man himself.

At the memorial she organized at Rib Eye Jacks on
June 8, Tiffers colours with the son of a friend of
George's. As the mother of two young sons, Tiffers
knows what dealing with restless children is like...

I don't claim to know George well. He was more of a smoking buddy when I was there. I remember one day while we were outside ingesting carcinogens, I suggested that he would have been a great pirate. Why, he asked? "Because you swear constantly, scowl even more and dude, you only have one leg!" He stared me down for a second and then started chuckling. "I like that. Pirate George," he grinned. "Actually, the crew would have called you Peg-Leg George," I corrected him. That earned a full-blown throaty guffaw.

He used to drink this bizarre combination of Coors Light with a shot a Goldschlager, a hot cinnamon liqueur from Denmark with actual little bits of gold flakes swirling around. Watching him drink this nasty-ass stuff one night, I noted bluntly, "Geezuz, you must crap glitter every morning." Oddly, he thought the pirate thing was funnier. What can I say? Comedy is subjective.

George was, at times, a gruff, even grouchy guy but still remained a lovable dude. If you're a Millennial, think Ron Swanson. If you're older, think Lou Grant. But in a wheelchair. He had a prosthetic leg but told me he usually just attached it to pad around the hotel at night. He preferred the chair.

Play it again, George. Just one last time.
Play it for us. Play it for you. Just play it.

But ask any waitress at either Rib Eye Jacks or Drafted and you'll hear something else. To them, George was a total doll. Everyone of them was "Sweetie" to George. He was generous. He was kind. He was an outside father figure, always encouraging them all to be whatever they wanted to be. The dude was totally a soft touch around the ladies.

So when his daughter Jessica organized a memorial for him on June 8 at Rib Eye Jacks (with some help from Tiffers), suffice it to say, it was well attended. His many friends, family and of course, the staff from both Rib Eye Jacks and Drafted, descended on my little Burlington watering hole. Quite a crowd and believe me, lots of stories. Jessica was telling our group that the first time her daughter saw George with his amputated leg was the same day she learned about Terry Fox in school. To those outside Canada reading this, Fox was a one-legged guy who at 21, tried running from one end of Canada to the other on his Marathon of Hope in 1980 to raise money for cancer awareness. This kid ran a full marathon (26 miles, 42 kilometres) every day. He didn't make it, stopping 5,373 kilometres (3,340 miles) into the journey when his cancer resurfaced in his lungs. Eventually, he succumbed to the disease but raised millions for his efforts and all across Canada, there are hundreds of fund-raising Terry Fox Runs every year since. But the point is on that exact day, Jessica says her daughter didn't look at him like he was just Grandpa any more. He was now something more. He became a bigger man... just like Terry Fox.

Ahhh, yes, this great Garnett Gerry
caricature of temperance leader Carrie
Nation is, I'm sure, a testament to her
fun-loving and easy-going personality.
The Temperance folks were all about fun

But one last story before it's Beer O'Clock here. You always remember the last conversation you have with someone before they pass so here's mine. Advance warning: get your Kleenex ready because tears are coming. I came in one night and George, already there, looked at my scraggly-ass hockey hair and barked with a smile, "You planning on getting that haircut anytime soon?" I smirked back, "Why? You need some for the top of your head? Getting cold at night?" I'll give you all a moment to collect yourselves emotionally, due to the extremely touching nature of our exchange.

But in the days following his death, if I saw Tiffers paused at the taps in front of me, I would simply ask, "You okay?" Every time, she answered, "Yeah, I'm good..." before her voice trailed off a little and she quietly added, "No... no, I'm not." At some point in the future, I'll ask the same question and maybe just get the first half of her answer. Some wounds run a little deeper and need far more healing time. That day will eventually come for Tiffers, just as it does for us all.

Since we're already in the Rib Eye Jack's Zone, so to speak, it's time to look at some of the goodies that Steve, the general manager, had slid in my direction recently in a little segment I like to call "Steve's Stash." This week, we're looking at a couple of hop-bombs and some sour power. And in Ontario, when we're talking about hops, as often as not, it's our good friends at Etobicoke's Great Lakes Brewing.

Holy crap, Big Rig Brewery has, in fact,
stepped up pretty big with this unfiltered
IPA. Rejoice, Ottawa citizens! Your local
craft brewer has your hop needs in hand.

GLB recently re-released My Bitter Wife IPA as part of their ongoing Tank Ten series and this time, in 473-ml (16 ounce) cans. The first time I had this, several years back, it was only released in 650-ml (22 ounce) bombers. And again, as I look back, I marvel at the many outstanding IPAs that have magically emerged from this tank - Lake Effects, My Bitter Wife, Karma Citra, Hopshop Maniacal, Thrust, an IPA and of course, my favourite, Octopus Wants To Fight. Coworker Jay-Dawg and I were talking about this very thing last week. How does one brewery make so many great IPAs that are all completely different in taste? (Jay has had them all except Maniacal which came out shortly before his Hops Journey began.) And the Bitter Wife is precisely as I remember it - huge grapefruit and tropical fruit on the nose, sly orange and pine on the tongue... if you need me, I'll be in Hop Heaven. Using Simcoe, Columbus and Centennial hops as the throat-punchers, this 7%, 88 IBU (international bitterness units) orange coloured pour is my new favourite this month... and will be replaced by my next new favourite when GLB brings out its next Tank Ten bad boy. These guys are the Stone Brewing of Canada. Believe me, that's my highest praise.

The Jelly King is Jay's absolute favourite beer
now as my co-worker has decided sours trump
IPAs. I will likely never think that but I am
having a lot of fun exploring the sour style...

So far, I have been a little hit and miss with Big Rig Brewery out of Ottawa. I was so-so on their Release the Hounds Black IPA but quite enjoyed their Bock Me Gently. So how did they do with their Alpha Bomb Unfiltered IPA? Well, now, ain't this a step up. They started the boil with Chinook and Columbus hops and then finished it off with Mosiac with two separate dry-hop sessions in the fermenter at the end. What does all this brewer mumbo-jumbo mean? In this case, a damn tasty little IPA at 6.6% and 87 IBUs. Grapefruit on the nose, tropical fruit juiciness on the tongue. Nice job, Big Rig! Keep 'em coming!

Next on deck are two sour beers, both from Bellwoods Brewery in Toronto and to be frank, I have discovered if Bellwoods can't do a style right, then no one can. They are one of Ontario's most innovative crafters. I have huge bro-love for their Witchshark Imperial IPA.  Okay, from the start, these are two very different sour beers. The Jelly King is Jay-Dawg's new favourite beer which is kinda funny as he was a self-declared "IPA Snob" all of a month ago. "Yup," he told me with a grin, "I'm a Sour Snob now." Hey, every beer has its audience.

And speaking of Rib Eye Jack's Ale House in Burlington,
Bill Bullen was the happy winner of the Amsterdam
Brewery "Cruiser Cycle" in a recent contest throughout
the GTA. For every Cruiser Session IPA you had on tap,
you'd get a ballot in the box. While the draw was random,
I'd suggest Bill may have had a few ballots brewing in
there. And for my money, that Cruiser Cycle is a nice
step away from those PT Cruisers made by Chrysler...

I quite liked the Jelly King. As citrus as hell (mostly lemon) on the nose and tongue, this 5.6% dry-hopped pucker bomb is a very distinct flavour. But I actually preferred the far more complex Motley Cru, which is fermented with Gewurztraminer grape must, which is, in essence, the pulp of the grape including the seeds and skin. That gave this a huge white wine flavour in the foreground which caught me a little off-guard because I am not a wine lover at all. But much to my surprise, I loved what it added to the flavour. As tart as hell, this has nice apple bits on the nose and some distinct woodiness on the tongue, which comes as no shock since the 8% much-in-demand beer was barrel-aged for two long years. The Motley Cru also has the distinction of being my Beer Writing Buddy Drunk Polkaroo's 1,000th beer on Untappd. He also raved about it. (For the record, his first Untappd beer was Old Milwaukee while his 500th was Muskoka's Twice As Mad Tom Double IPA. Whoa... that's quite a step up from #1 to #500.)

Okay, next up is all goodies that were gifted to me - two Innocente offerings from Steve's Stash, a couple of Sleeping Giant (Thunder Bay) brews from coworker Sassy Cassy, as well as a Block 3 Imperial IPA out of St Jacobs. And the big new about All or Nothing Brewhouse out of Oshawa buying up Trafalgar Ale and Meads in Oakville. What the hell happened there? I'll find out and let you know. As for me, I did 10 sit-ups this morning so dammit, I think I've earned that Handicapped parking spot at work! But guys and dolls, that's it, that's all and I am outta here! Until next time, I remain...

One Gord still with us... one not

The news about Gord Downie caught us all by
surprise. The subsequent news that the group
would nonetheless tour this summer caught no
one by surprise. That's how Canadians roll...

It seems recent weeks have seen for more bad news than good news for Canada. It started on May 24 when iconic Canadian rock band, The Tragically Hip, announced on their website that singer Gord Downie had inoperable brain cancer. The outpouring of grief, sympathy and support was instantaneous by 9 a.m., washing across the land from the Atlantic Ocean to the Pacific.

For the past 30 years, The Hip (as we call them here) and their music has been woven tightly into the Canadian social fabric. For most Canadians, aged 20 to 60, they have been the penultimate Canadian band, a musical touchstone for each subsequent generation from their debut in 1987 until now. As such, the band may mean different things to different people; different age brackets but in the end, there is universal agreement from every age that they are Canada's band. To very deliberately steal from Molson's, they... are Canadian.

However, that bad news was coupled with some good news from the band. In the same announcement came the news that they would be touring Canada this Summer, likely their last tour at Downie's request. A week later, this good news announcement came with some bad reality. Every ticket for every show in every major Canadian marketplace was sold out within a minute of their release, 99.9% of which were snapped up by scalpers.

Did you know that Canada Post had issued a stamp
honouring The Tragically Hip? No, of course, you didn't!
Really, when was the last time you actually mailed a letter?

Now calling scalpers "vultures" is pretty unfair, not to mention callous, to the scavenger bird who acts only on its hard-wired instincts. Scalpers are like two subcultures below that bird. Down there with the lawyers and pimps. By posting them on legal sites, such as StubHub and kajiji (sites created to make scalpers' jobs even easier, thank you very much), the tickets have jumped from a face value of (I believe) $125 to $175 to well over $500 per and in some cases, up to nearly $5,000. Somehow, Beer Bro Glenn pulled some magic out of his arse and lucked into one for $166 during a pre-sale.

Now radio deejays did not take the scalping very lightly and in many cases, called the scalpers to ask them on-air if they were proud of how they made a living. The answer from every scalper I heard could be summed up in five indifferent words: "I don't give a shit."

And then, we lost a Gordie. On Friday, June 10th, 
Gordie Howe, definitely the biggest name ever in
hockey (sorry, Gretzky, but it's true) passed at the
age of 88. While stem cell treatment was able to
help Howe fully recover from a severe stroke, it
seems they have less luck against the hands of time

But one deejay, Jesse from hard rock station HTZ-FM in St Catharines, Ontario, got a big one back for the hurtin' Hip fans. Calling a scalper, he inquired about a pair of $850 tickets. The guy says, sure, I have them. So Jesse asked if he can drive them to St Catharines from his city of Mississauga, a distance of 92 kilometres (57 miles) and the scalper balks. So Jesse sweetens the pot, saying he'll pay $2,000 for the pair. Since that distance is maybe $20 in gas and the scalper stands to gain an additional $300, he quickly agrees and they decide to meet at the city's super mall, Pen Centre. Once the scalper arrives, he calls Jesse, still on-air, who then tells the asshat to go screw himself. The scalper was livid - hilariously so - and started in on a bleeped-profanity-filled rant. Best Punk'd of 2016. Well done, Jesse! At least something funny came out of all this.

But let's not turn this into a eulogy for Mr. Downie. Hell, the man is still happily with us and ready to hit the stage. The problem is my way of thinking is that eulogies, wakes and celebrations of life tend to happen after the person's passed and can't hear it. I say let's joyfully, gratefully and vocally celebrate Gord's life while we still have him. Sound good?

You see because while one Gord is still here, less than three weeks later, Canada lost its biggest Gord ever - Mr Hockey, Gordie Howe at the age of 88. The news rocked us.

A statue of Gordie Howe outside the Sears in
Saskatoon, Saskatchewan pays tribute to his skills
with the elbows but begs two questions. If you live
outside Canada, yes, Saskatoon and Saskatchewan
are actual places but two, who knew Sears was still
around? Thought they left long before Gordie did.

The word of his death spread like wildfire on social media that morning and it seems that many of my high school mates had crossed his path at some point. Although I appear to be the only one lucky enough to have a picture taken with him, there were no shortage of meeting-him stories. All of them had a common element - for all of the bruises he left others with on the ice, he was, in person, one helluva nice guy.

Kevin Callaghan noted that Gordie was at a large breakfast meeting with him. "Despite a long line, he took the time to talk to me when I asked him to autograph his book. Such a nice man." A pioneer in Oakville women's hockey, Annie Oakes "played against him once." So did "Uncle Frank" Galati. (Years ago, he posted something on Facebook that his nieces and nephews were all commenting on so I joined in, calling him Uncle Frank just as they were. Shitty-ass uncle, by the way. Never buys me anything.) That said, Uncle Frank tells a great Gordie story. "When I was 28, a few friends and I joined the Gordie Howe Hockey League for Adults... a beginner's league using Gordie's name to market it. Midway through our season, as we were getting ready for a game, Mr Hockey entered our locker room with his duffel bag." Gordie just nodded to them, putting on his equipment with them while they sat there, staring at him like slack-jawed yokels. On the ice though? "He skated circles around us. He took me against the boards and rubbed those enormous elbows against my face. He had fun with us." For the record, Howe would have been in his late-50s by then.

No, Cheesy never got a picture of himself with
his idol, Gordie Howe, but at Howe's funeral in
Detroit, hockey's royalty, past and present, were
in attendance and he managed to get one with
some rink-rat named Wayne Gretzky. Not bad.

Granted, the one guy we all thought of instantly was Greg Cheesewright, aka Cheesy, who grew up idolizing Howe and well into adulthood, continues to do so. The news clearly would have gutted him. I recalled his tale of how, already having a Red Wings emblem and the number 9 tattooed on his lower left calf, he saw Howe at a book signing once and got him to sign his name in marker just below that. The second he left, he called his tattoo girl and had it permanently etched in. In fact, as a successful local businessman and hockey coach, Cheesy is so well-known by the Detroit Red Wings organization that he was invited to attend Howe's private funeral on June 15. It was likely the only funeral ever attended by more past and present hockey stars than civilians.

Even Beer Bro and college buddy, Stevil St Evil, watched the Howe funeral on TV from his perch in Wellington, New Zealand with a sense of awe. "Wow, lots of hockey greats at this funeral! All of them, I guess. I bet every guy still alive who played against Gordie has a memorable bruise somewhere. Like if you asked any of them, 'Hey, remember playing against Gordie?', I bet they rub a shoulder or a jaw or a hip, wince and say, 'Oh yeah! Hell of a guy!'"

Despite the fact it was planned a week prior, when Beer Bro Glenn popped into Donny's Bar and Grill for an afternoon and evening of craft-beer-drenched debauchery on June 11, it too ended up being a mini-wake for Mr Hockey as the Toronto newspapers he brought along had literally dozens of pages of stories about Mr Hockey.

Beauty and the Beast. Glenn holds up a Smuttynose
Finestkind IPA, one beauty of a beer out of New
Hampshire. You can guess the beast element here.

Settled in with our beers, Glenn quickly noted that despite calling a goal, an assist and a fighting major "a Gordie Howe hat-trick", the man himself only achieved it twice in a career that touched five decades (1946-1980). The Howe hat-trick was meant to be more of a testament of how fluidly he combined innate skills with Prairie-boy toughness.

But hey, this little horse-and-pony show is supposed to be about beer, not rock singers or hockey legends, so let's raise our mugs to Beer O'Clock at Donny's Bar and Grill. As he always does, Glenn did one of his infamous Beer Runs into Niagara Falls, New York, to snag some stellar American beers and he came back with a trunkful. We happily spent the afternoon and evening, noshing away on the many IPAs in my fridge - Flying Monkeys' Smashbomb Atomic, Collective Arts' Ransack The Universe, Smuttynose Finestkind, Muskoka's Mad Tom and of course, fresh growlers of my homeboys Nickel Brook's Headstock. But when he left, he gifted me with a nifty little Mix-Six of American treats and a gnarly 650-ml (22 ounces) bomber of a dessert beer. The remainder of the contents in Glenn's trunk? Yeah, that's gonna take him a while - let's just say, he makes his illicit trips well worth his while. And here's the best part: when coming back, the border guards ask him what he has, Glenn always tells the truth and half the time he pays duty but the other half? They just wave him through. One time, a guard asked incredulously, "What? No beer in Canada?"

I got your Independence Day right here, American friends,
with some Stone Enjoy By 07-04-16 IPA. Fireworks, man!

So over the next couple of days, I enjoyed some American influence in my Canuck fridge. While I am a huge proponent of drinking locally (meaning Ontario), my fridge is less staunch about it, having no borders, no walls and since it plays an intrical role in my life, I do not argue with my favourite appliance. Now Glenn will not return to my pad from a USA sojourn without a Stone Ruination Double IPA as it is my number one Yankee beer. He didn't want to buy a sixer of it so he slipped one into a six of Stone's Enjoy By IPA. Sneaky, yes, but I got my Ruination. With its Centennial, Citra, Simcoe and Azacca hops, this 8.5%, 100 IBU (international bitterness units) head-basher is always deliciously tropical fruit on the nose but a pine and orange finish on the tongue. When it comes to Stone, out of Escondido, California, Glenn and I have a shared phrase: Stone can brew no wrong. (You can use that, Stone. Contact me and we'll come to reasonable terms that will involve more Ruination.)

Oddly, I am not a pineapple fan and think
anyone who puts it on their pizza should be
shot on sight. Somehow when it lands in a beer,
I always enjoy it. Ballast Point does it again!

A few visits ago, Glenn brought me a Stone Enjoy By IPA and it was very date-specific - Enjoy By 02-14-15, my birthday last year. This round's batch was a nod to America's Independence Day - 07-04-16. This is the 26th batch of Enjoy By and the rules are always the same. You have 37 days to enjoy it... or else. These things don't last 37 minutes in my fridge so not an issue. Stone uses ten hops in this brew so there everything on the nose - citrus, grapefruit, pine, mango - followed by all that plus some orange and malt backbone on the tongue. The 9.2% ABV is so fruit-saturated that it's not even discernable. But that 90 IBUs? Oh yeah, you know you're drinking a premier IPA. Always outstanding and very much enjoyed by... me. Twice. My little Mix-Six had a deuce.

Oddly, in real life - so the one-quarter that's non-beer - I shun pineapple. It's bumpy, has weird leaf-hair and frankly, I have an innate fear that one day, a pineapple will fall on my head and kill me. That said, I faced my fears and tried the Ballast Point (San Diego) Pineapple Sculpin. I have had their Grapefruit Sculpin in the past (also courtesy of Glenn) and this is the same idea, except they used pineapple puree in the brewing.

Glenn crossed the USA border, hoping to
score a Stone Enjoy By Tangerine IPA but
couldn't find one so he happily settled for this

As it turns out, I do like pineapple in my beer... yes, I do, Sam-I-Am. I got a whiff of it and caramel on the nose of this 7%, 70 IBU beer and much more pineapple on the tongue. For the record, Glenn got citrus on the tongue and no pineapple but he lives on lava-hot Pizza Pockets so his taste buds were fried 20 years ago. (Said the smoker.)

Ironically, Glenn's entire purpose for crossing the border was to find Stone's Enjoy By 05-30-16 Tangerine IPA. He struck out. Let's assume they were all enjoyed by May 30th. But he did find Uinta Brewing's (Salt Lake City) Hop Nosh Tangerine IPA so close enough. I had the regular Uinta Hop Nosh IPA in Las Vegas and found it quite enjoyable. This tweak to it meant much more orange and tangerine on the nose with pretty much the same on the tongue. At 7.3% and 70 IBUs, this was a very nice little beer. Not quite Stone level, perhaps, but very few are.

The last time I had a beer from New Belgium Brewing out of Fort Collins, Colorado, it too was an offering from Glenn, their Ranger IPA. I remember it like it was yesterday - Easter Monday 2014. And that is all I remember from that day. This time, it was their Rampart Imperial IPA and with its Mosaic, Calypso and Centennial hops, this is a definitely step up from the Ranger. All grapefruit on the nose, a dry citrus tang on the tongue, this 8.5%, 85 IBU was a dynamite car explosion of taste.

This picture (not mine) says it all. What does 24
Carrot Golden Ale taste like? Look at the glass.

Every year, Stone Brewing holds a local homebrewer challenge and last year's Mutt Brown Imperial Brown Ale was the winner that Glenn and I thoroughly enjoyed. This year, the top honours went to homebrewer Juli Goldenburg who collaborated with Stone head brewer Mitch Steele and San Diego's Monkey Paw brewmaster Cosimo Sorrentino to create the 24 Carrot Golden Ale. How did it taste? Exactly like liquid carrot cake, which ironically tastes nothing like carrots. Or anything other vegetable. This 8.5%, 40 IBU dessert beer was all cinnamon on the nose, sweet ginger, vanilla, some raisin and well, pretty much carrot cake on the tongue. It was a delicious and sweet break from all those IPAs

Okey-dokey, that's it for this round but I will be back this weekend with a tribute to another man, George, a regular at Rib Eye Jack's Ale House, who also passed away recently. (Seriously, 2016, enough already.) But I did notice that when Glenn visits, he always checks my parking lot carefully. First, he once got a ticket here. But more importantly, he scans the area for other familiar cars. His concern is that this might not be an afternoon of tasty beers but rather, an intervention. Believe me when I say, this is absolutely the wrong locale for that. But guys and dolls, that's it, that's all and I am outta here. Until next time, I remain, as always...